Tuesday, May 31, 2011

Walsh for President!

That giant ticking sound you hear is the clock ticking on Eighth District Congressman Joe Walsh. As readers of this blog are metronomically aware ...
Walshed Out?
Walsh, for all intents and purposes, has been redistricted out of the Eighth, and is left with the unenviable choice of choosing from among the least bad of some bad re-election options. Your LakeCountyEye had narrowed the field down to three -- run in either the Eighth, Tenth or Fourteenth Congressional Districts -- that is, until reading Walsh's recent profile in Slate:
Since being sworn in less than six months ago, Walsh has appeared on prime time cable news or Sunday shows 28 times. When Congress is in session, he can appear more than once a week. What the cable bookers get is an excitable, handsome freshman who will say anything.
What Did He Just Say?
Meet Rep. Joe Walsh, the biggest media hound in the freshman class.
The mystery behind Walsh's grandstanding, media-frenzied, freakshow politics turns out to be no mystery at all. Well, duh, Walsh is going to run for President. Of the United States. Of America.

And who wouldn't, given the competition? A formidable incumbent President Obama has the Republican field spooked. Their a-list presidential hopefuls have decided to sit this one out, leaving behind a slate of sorry sadsack also-rans. The GOP's great white hope is ... Minnesotan Jim Pawlenty? Seriously, turn on the teevee lights and a bareknuckle media brawler like Walsh would whip a cheese-eating wannabee like Tom Pawlenty into political fondue.

Walsh may be a longshot to get the Republican presidential nomination. But he would be following a long line of GOP presidential trailblazers. Like Donald Trump. And Ron Paul. And Fred Thompson. And Alan Keyes.

Take it to the Broadway Bank ... Joe Walsh for President in 2012!

Monday, May 30, 2011

Walshed Out?

By the time Joe Walsh woke Saturday morning, on his Eighth Congressional District office futon, the Eighth Congressional District had been moved 50 miles south to downstate Villa Park. The new Eighth -- which looks like something posted on the LakeCountyEye windshield -- is now to be found in Cook, Kane & DuPage Counties. Operatives will note they do not see in the above list, Lake County, the home to your lakeCountyEye. Nor will they see McHenry County, home to Congressman Walsh. The Congressman is invited to join your LakeCountyEye in wishing the Eighth District good riddance.

Without a a District to call home, Walsh is Illinois's newest Congressional floater. Thanks to the magic of the gerrymander, Walsh's legal residence -- now in the Eighth District portion of northern McHenry County -- will be in the new Fourteenth District:
By your LakeCountyEye's reckoning, Walsh is left with few good options.
  1. Eighth Congressional District
    Walsh would have the an incumbent's advantage if he ran for re-election in the new 8th District. But he would have to start voting Aye on some federal spending bills -- Walsh would need that Route 53 extension if he decides to commute from his legal residence in Johnsburg down to the new 8th. He'll also need a taste for ethnic food, campaigning there, as the new 8th was cut to include a large percentage of minority and immigrant voters. Good luck to any candidate down there who plans to ride to victory again on the back of a xenophobic Teaparty.
  2. Tenth Congressional District
    The new 10th District is just a metaphorical stone's throw from Walsh's current mailing address. However the 10th is currently held by a fellow Republican freshman, Robert Dold. Dold has his own problems having been gerrymandered into the new 9th District, held by Jan Schakowsky. But unless Dold has been drinking the insecticides, your LakeCountyEye expects Dold to run for re-election as the incumbent in the new 10th District. So Walsh would be facing a primary vs Dold in the new 10th. And then a general election vs an unknown opponent in a district cut to benefit a Democratic candidate.
  3. Fourteenth Congressional District
    Walsh has one advantage in that the new 14th District is where his mail is delivered. A disadvantage is that this is also home to fellow Republican freshman Randy Hultgren, who currently represents the 14th District. Walsh would be facing a primary vs Hultgren in the new 14th. However the new 14th District was drawn to be a Republican vote-sink, taking in locales like Squaw Grove Township and most of McHenry County. The winner in the Republican primary there would be strongly favored to win in the general election.
As a matter of principle, your LakeCountyEye is opposed to legalized gambling. But if you must gamble, gamble responsibly, and bet on crossing paths with the Joe Walsh campaign bus next time you're visiting Squaw Grove Township.

Saturday, May 28, 2011

Cooked Over

The operatives are not feeling the love. A McHenry County campaign survival guide posted here, this week ...
Ozymandias, I Met a Traveller from an Antique Land
touched off a torrent of angry responses. Nearly all demanded to know why this blog -- so generous when it comes to aiming the satirical eye toward McHenry County -- virtually ignores the much more populous and relevant Cook County to the south. Well your LakeCountyEye wants to take this opportunity to reassure all you Cook County operatives who aren't feeling the love that, no, you aren't chopped liver.

In fact, as readers of this blog are handsomely aware ...
Not 100% Strange Bedfellows
there is now a distinct possibility that Lake County will get its very own Cook County legislator, for the 59th District, Sid Mathias. Cook Countians venture north of the border rarely, except when to buy Lake County's duty-free cigarettes and beer. Any Cook County politician planning an election campaign in Lake County would be advised to respect the laws and customs up here. To that end, your LakeCountyEye has compiled a Lake County campaign survival guide. Here are ten best-practices for seeking election in Lake County:

A Lake County Political Survival Guide
for Cook County Politicians:
Ten Campaign Tips

  1. Make friends with the country club Republicans at the TeamAmerica10th blog.
  2. For discounted petition signatures, Waukegan is your best bet. Ask for their bulk rates.
  3. The county clerk counts the votes. Address those birthday & holiday cards to Mr Willard Helander.
  4. Lake County is home to 75 major inland lakes, and coincidentally 75 county repositories for your opponent's yardsigns.
  5. Looking for that perfect venue for a fundraiser? Lake County has plenty of casinos.
  6. If you blow a red-light on the way to that fundraiser, Sen Dan Duffy can take care of that ticket for you.
  7. And if you need to be there immediately, the Route 53 Extension is only minutes away.
  8. No, RALC is not lolspeak.
  9. Don't forget that goldfish are eligible to vote in Lake County.
  10. Free train rides for the entire family at the Sidney H Mathias Metra Station, Buffalo Grove IL!

Look for your LakeCountyEye, ragin' against the Cook County machine.

Friday, May 27, 2011

Not 100% Strange Bedfellows

Your LakeCountyEye, like most political bloggers, wakes up no later than 1pm every day to a hot cup of Red Bull (with a Mountain Dew chaser), and a copy of the latest news from the CapitolFaxBlog. One item in particular caught the LakeCountyEye eye this past morning:
A Lake County blogger wonders aloud why Rep. Ed Sullivan got such a sweet new map...
Republicans "leaning against" filing their own remap proposal as Dem map tweaked for Latinos and congressional map release date still uncertain
Hmm, your bleary-eyed LakeCountyEye wondered, which Lake County blogger could that be? Perhaps because your LakeCountyEye was of yet insufficiently caffeinated, it took a while to comprehend that the clicky-click-link goes directly to this blog, right here -- the LakeCountyEye. Just how dope is that anyways?

Suffice it to say, the trenchant post in question in the work of esteemed colleague, the Mr Redtail ...
Madigan ♥s Sullivan
where it is revealed that Lake County may be seeing a lot more of one legislator who hails from south-of-the-border, Sid Mathias. With the new legislative remap, a safe Democratic District 59 is being crafted for the benefit of State Rep Carol Sente. As a necessary consequence, all of those yucky & gross Republican precincts in Sente's district will be dumped without ceremony into the more-than-accommodating Rep Ed Sullivan's commodious 51st District. While nearby warm & fuzzy Democratic precincts will be drawn-in from unguarded turf, like from Sid Mathias's 53rd District.

But if the proposed new legislative map becomes law, Sente's district will not only pick up a bunch of Mathias's Democratic precincts, it will scoop up Mathias -- who lives in one of those precincts -- as well. All of which leaves the door open to the real possibility of a Sente (D) vs Mathias (R) contest in 2012, for District 59.

And Lake County may be facing the unlikely but real prospect of seeing one of its central Representative districts held by a legislator from Cook County. Sure, District 59 is being carved out for a Democrat, with the goal of securing a (W) for Sente in 2012. But, um, who doesn't know that Mathias is a Democrat as well -- one that because of some typographic mixup happens to have an (R) after his name? Your LakeCountyEye thinks the law of unintended consequences might come to haunt District 59. Mathias, a 12-year legislator, is highly regarded throughout the area. There's even a train station named for him in Buffalo Grove. There may be no truth to the rumor that Mathias gets to ride his Metra train for free. But this particular Machiavellian plan to derail Mathias's long string of election-day free-rides may just backfire. Springfield Democrats, be careful what you wish for.

Thursday, May 26, 2011

Madigan ♥s Sullivan

The legislative remap proposal announced by the House had its share of Gerry-manders giving Democrats galore seats from which to kick back and enjoy the perks of incumbency without the bother of pesky, contested elections.

Predictably, Republicans howled, perceiving that they were in for multiple short ends of sticks. No such howling was heard from central Lake County, however, where one Republican was the lucky recipient of his own gerrymander. Call it a Sulli-mander.

The original gerrymander got its name for the elongated district created to help a candidate favored by Massachusetts Governor Elbridge Gerry way back in 1812.
The Sulli-mander, a mirror image of the original, features a swath of Ed Sullivan's District 51 Democrats (all of downtown Mundelein) herded into a narrow peninsula and given to next-door Rep. Carol Sente in District 59. The loss of those Democrats makes it almost impossible for Rep. Ed Sullivan to ever lose his seat, except in a primary to a fellow Republican or when he retires 75 years from now.
Hmmm. We wonder what Eddie Sullivan did to earn such a wet, sloppy kiss from King Madigan. Luck o' the Irish?

Wednesday, May 25, 2011

Q the Eye/05.25.11

Dear LakeCountyEye,

I've been laboring at a nearby political blog for many years and would love to come just close to matching your success. Can you share with the little guys where you get your ideas?

Thanks Again

Dear TA,

Your LakeCountyEye is always happy to come to the aid of a fellow blogger down on their luck. Blogging is no different than show business, and political blogging is no different than show business squared:
Be nice to people on your way up because you'll meet them on your way down.
So where does your LakeCountyEye get your LakeCountyEye's ideas? Here's a secret a wise old ancient mesoamerican shaman blogger once imparted upon your LakeCountyEye through an ibogaine induced haze:
Amateurs imitate and pros steal.
Take for instance that hilarious Internet Top Ten list posted on this blog yesterday, where your LakeCountyEye poked gentle fun at the unthinking & preconceived stereotypes people have against McHenry County:
A McHenry County Political Survival Guide: Ten Campaign Tips
1) Make friends with the disoriented government pensioners at the McHenryCountyBlog.
2) Watch some Green Acres reruns.
3) That farmer's market really is one.
4) The largest municipality in your district is Wal-Mart.
5) Be sure to attend McHenry County's Antique & Restored Auto Parade, AKA Route 31.
6) Lobbyists may hand you confederate money.
7) Candidates are expected to know the Napoleonic code.
8) Don't forget that livestock are eligible to vote in McHenry County.
9) McHenry County residents are not glad to see you. That's a gun in their pocket.
10) Remember: you're not in Kansas any more.

Ozymandias, I Met a Traveller from an Antique Land
Where did this bit of buffoonery come from? 100% borrowed from the McHenryCountyBlog. Follow this link to the McHenryCountyBlog and you will see that your LakeCountyEye lifted the complete gag verbatim, and word-for-word:
Lake County Political Blogger Offers Advice on How Lake County Candidates Should Prepare for McHenry County Voters
Take it from your LakeCountyEye, the McHenryCountyBlog is a treasure-trove of found-humor. Of course, your LakeCountyEye does not cadge exclusively from the McHenryCountyBlog. It goes without saying that many, many other blogs are pilfered from as well. But it is a virtual certainty that the McHenryCountyBlog has never heard of -- let alone ever read -- this blog. And your LakeCountyEye feels confident about appropriating comic material from McHenryCountyBlog for years to come, without having to worry about ever hearing a peep out of them.

Your LakeCountyEye is not particularly proud of these revelations. But in the blog-eat-blog world of Internet blogging, a blogger needs to do what a blogger needs to do.

If you are an elected official, or a previously elected official, or just a private citizen under indictment, send your political questions to Q the Eye c/o ... LakeCountyEye@gMail.com

Tuesday, May 24, 2011

I Met a Traveller from an Antique Land

Yes, it may have narrowly avoided an invasion of the 13-year cicadas. But Lake County is still on schedule to be pillaged by the 10-year Illinois political remapping. There was already one close call: State Senator Suzi Schmidt just missed by less than a furlong being redrawn outside the 31st District. Your LakeCountyEye does note there is little truth to the rumor that Senate Republican leaders asked her to change her name to Suzi Schick in commemoration of the razor-thin close shave.

Your LakeCountyEye broke the story on Sunday that another Rep, JoAnn Osmond, wasn't as lucky -- and after the maps are redrawn will in all likelihood reside inside Michael Tryon's adjacent Representative District 64.
District 61 Revisited
The Daily Herald did some old-fashioned reportorial legwork on Osmond's plight, yesterday afternoon:
Here's what she said on Facebook.
"After the map release yesterday I have to look hard at my future ... stay in my home and run in McHenry County, move to my current district ... or retire. These are all options for the summer debate. I am fortunate to have support from so many family and friends."
Now, Osmond represents a district that spans the northern part of Lake County. There's a district like that in the proposed map. But Osmond would live in a district that would look significantly different, taking up the northwestern part of Lake County and sprawling into McHenry County.

Rep. JoAnn Osmond not a fan of her proposed district
In other words, what Rep Osmond must contemplate is the difference between indoor plumbing and none of the above. Your LakeCountyEye feels her pain. The situation however is by no means hopeless. There are many people who manage to pursue what could pass as normal lives over in McHenry County. It's simply a matter of possessing the right survival skills. Your LakeCountyEye has contacted some of McHenry County's prominent elected officials and they have shared their secrets. Here are ten items to remember when running for election in McHenry County:

A McHenry County Political Survival Guide:
Ten Campaign Tips

  1. Make friends with the disoriented government pensioners at the McHenryCountyBlog.

  2. Watch some Green Acres reruns.

  3. That farmer's market really is one.

  4. The largest municipality in your district is Wal-Mart.

  5. Be sure to attend McHenry County's Antique & Restored Auto Parade, AKA Route 31.

  6. Lobbyists may hand you confederate money.

  7. Candidates are expected to know the Napoleonic code.

  8. Don't forget that livestock are eligible to vote in McHenry County.

  9. McHenry County residents are not glad to see you. That's a gun in their pocket.

  10. Remember: you're not in Kansas any more.

Look for your LakeCountyEye, downloading more of those hilarious Jeff Foxworthy MP4s.

Sunday, May 22, 2011

District 61 Revisited

As readers of this blog are aware, the Illinois legislative maps are all being redrawn ...
31 Favors
Operatives looking for a Lake County angle on the story should expect to hear the crickets from the MSM and influential bloggers, who all seem to be relaxing this weekend on their big yachts or big golfcourses. For the big unreported remap story, however, look no farther than State Representative District 61, held by State Rep JoAnn Osmond. Well, District 61 used to be represented by her anyways, because if the new map lines are drawn as-is, Osmond will no longer live in her district:
The new Representative District 61 is the part shaded in green. Operatives are challenged to figure out on their own where Osmond's home address is. As a hint, the part shaded in purple is Representative District 64 -- which is currently held by a different Republican, Michael Tryon. Operatives are asked to visualize Rep District 64 breaching a levy separating Lake from McHenry County, and inundating Antioch and many other Lake County municipalities.

This is not all bad news for Osmond. Tryon, like Osmond, has been redistricted out of his district. The new Rep District 64 will be up for grabs in 2012, and presumably waits for Osmond to claim it. Which will make the new Rep District 61 an open seat. It could happen. Operatives are advised to stay tuned.

Saturday, May 21, 2011

31 Favors

It seems that Summer always arrives early in Lake County, like a sweaty towelboy in a Turkish bath. And LakeCountyEye operatives are burning with the fever for one thing only: new district maps. As readers of this blog are cartogorically aware ...
The Comic Landscape
a whole bunch of new Illinois legislative and congressional maps were released or leaked this week. There was a surprise or two. The Daily Herald found one truffle, a shotgun marriage arranged betwixt State Reps Carol Sente and Sid Mathias ...
we've found one nugget of interest so far. It looks like Democratic Rep. Carol Sente of Vernon Hills would have to run against Republican Rep. Sid Mathias of Buffalo Grove.
Sente and Mathias together?
Another nougatty morsel to be unearthed is up in Senate District 31, where State Senator Suzi Schmidt will likely run for re-election. According to the Daily Herald ...
Republican state Sen. Suzi Schmidt expressed no alarm Thursday over a legislative remap proposed by Senate Democrats that sees her 31st District being encroached upon from the west by the 32nd District — all the way into the western third of Schmidt's home base of Lake Villa Township.
Schmidt feels shifting Senate districts
More precisely, all the way into Schmidt's backyard. Schmidt may reside in a new 31 -- but, as a Dan Rather might say, just by the hair of one's chinny-chin-chin:

Senate Redistricting Proposed Map
The new Senate 31 is the part shaded in green. Operatives are challenged to figure out, on their own, where Schmidt's home address is. The last time your LakeCountyEye saw a closer shave, Joe Walsh beat Melissa Bean by 291 votes. Just sayin!

Thursday, May 19, 2011

The Comic Landscape

Last time your LakeCountyEye checked, the comedians at the McHenryCountyBlog were rehearsing one of their hilarious Vladimir & Estragon routines. They dug up, from somewhere on the web, a proposed final version of the 2001 Illinois legislative remap. Mistaking it for the much anticipated 2011 legislative remap, they published a long deadpan blog-post, measuring the proposed 2001 map up against the actual, ratified current legislative map:
Below on the left you can see the current map for the three state representatives for McHenry County. District 63 is Jack Franks', District 64 is Mike Tryon's and District 52 is Mark Beaubien's. And, it looks a lot like the map now, at least in this county.
New State Rep. Maps Appear on Speaker's Web Site
It looks a lot like the map now at least in this county, as indeed it should -- the two were essentially the same map. Stop it you guys are killing your LakeCountyEye!

For operatives who are curious, here's what the actual, current, 2001 legislative map looks like:
2001 Illinois Legislative Map
Of course, your LakeCountyEye doesn't go to the trouble of publishing these posts just for the opportunity to poke fun of the McHenryCountyBlog. This post is in fact an excuse for showing what the all-new, actual, 2011 legislative remap looks like. You heard it here first -- the proposed 2011 Illinois legislative remap is now out, for real & all over the Internet:
Proposed 2011 Illinois Legislative Map

Legislative District Proposal Released
The art of re-drawing State Senate & Rep boundary lines usually requires the deft hand of a surgeon, and in actuality is performed by someone handy with a meat cleaver. So naturally the new 2011 map will have far-reaching political consequences for Lake County, not to mention the entire state. In uncertain times like these, operatives turn to this blog for analysis and guidance, as well they should. Your LakeCountyEye hopes not to disappoint.

Your LakeCountyEye has taken the opportunity to parse the proposed 2011 Illinois legislative map through patented NASA image processing equipment and algorithms, and integrated the results with the latest available demographic, topographic, meterological and geographical numbers. The resulting picture has lead your LakeCountyEye to one single inescapable & irrefutable conclusion: the new one looks a lot like the map that exists now, at least in this county.

Ha ha. Ha ha.

Wednesday, May 18, 2011

Dropping Names

So, some operative who turns out to be a trustee at some library district has been showing up to heckle at the public meetings of some government housing agency that fired some wife of his, all the while under some assumed name. Or some junk like that.

So the Daily Herald blasted him in an editorial:
It happens when people lack the courage to stand up for what they say and to say only what they can stand up for. Back in December, we spoke against that kind of destructive misinformation as we floated a series of New Year's resolutions for 2011. It bears repeating. "If you can't sign it," we advised, "don't say it, online, in print or anywhere else."
Speak your mind, and your name
To show -- oh snap! -- they mean business, the Herald notes:
you'll find our names in the top right corner
The word our was italicized for emphasis, although it may have been more forthright of the Herald to italicize the word names, instead. It is easier, after all, to be a courageous editorial writer when there is a committee to hide behind. Your LakeCountyEye did check the top right corner, but only found a banner ad for used cars. Anyhow, here's an actual, undoctored, screen-cap of the editorial:
Operatives are asked to please insert, where one would expect to see an author's signature, a cricket chirrup.

It goes without saying there are countless blogs out there that write with the thick patina of authority, but hide behind fake names like McHenryCountyBlog, TeamAmerica10th, EllenOfTheTenth. Here at your LakeCountyEye you have your LakeCountyEye's solemn pledge: behind every statement made on this blog will stand an honest name -- the name of a true, forthright, courageous individual with an honest name like Barney Baxter or Mr Redtail or Bemused or D-Mac-10 or MadMaxMadsen. And not some totally fake used car dealer ad.

Tuesday, May 17, 2011

ReMaps of the Ancient World

The out-to-pasture government pensioners at the McHenryCountyBlog reported, yesterday, details of the new Illinois Rep & Senate maps:
The House Speaker's reapportionment web site seems to have new maps. Well, they definitely have different maps, but there's no way to figure out how new, because the date of the new maps is nowhere to be found. No way to ask at 10 o'clock because the email doesn't work. But there is a new map for McHenry County which does pretty much what people at the public hearing requested.
New State Rep. Maps Appear on Speaker's Web Site
The new hot maps were reproduced on the blog:
Erm, reliable sources assure your LakeCountyEye that Currie II was the settled-upon 2002 remap, from back in the day ...
On September 5, 2001, Democrats won a lottery that added a tie-breaking ninth member (Michael Bilandic) to the bipartisan state Legislative Redistricting Commission, which on September 25, 2001 by a 5–4 party-line vote approved the Democratic map called "Currie II as amended by the Bilandic Amendment" after its Legislative Redistricting Commission member authors, state Rep. Barbara Flynn Currie (D-25) of Hyde Park and former Chicago Mayor Bilandic.
The apparently disoriented McHenryCountyBlog might have noticed a wrong turn was taken on the Information Superhighway, from the source they cited:

Illinois Redistricting
After being apprised of the mistake, the McHenryCountyBlog issued a correction:
Go figure. There are two reapportionment web sites out there. The 2001 is still active and that's what I happened upon last night before I wrote the article below, which might be useful for historical purposes but has nothing to do with the map being drawn by Democrats this year.
New State Rep. Maps Appear on Speaker's Web Site – But They Are From 2001
Erm, a quick look at the domain -- clients.ecampaigning.com -- and it's easy to see that there are not two reapportionment websites out there. The website in question is by no means an Illinois government or political website. It turns out instead to be a commercial site owned by a web-design company -- the company that built the 2002 webpage cited as their source by the McHenryCountyBlog:

Campaign Advisory Corporation
Note to operatives: 2002 era maps are, c'mon, like totally oldschool. Your LakeCountyEye never ventures outdoors without the 4G GPS.

Monday, May 16, 2011

Q the Eye/05.16.11

Dear LakeCountyEye,

I'm just a simple country state's attorney trying to do my job as best as I can. But some fools over at one of the fool schooldistricts got caught using their government issue email IDs where they shouldn't. My teapartybase is seething around the collar, and want them sent up to Leavenworth for the rest of their lives. Honestly, I got more important items in the hopper, like retirement, and such matters.

Tempests in a Teapot

Dear Tea Cozy,

Who doesn't look forward to retirement (especially on a government pension)? To lazy days of comfort & ease, nestled betwixt the friendly confines of the parental unit's half-finished basement, fortified with string cheese & nachos, all the while typing any old half-backed idea straight into the Internet, and mostly at random. But many more moons shall pass before your LakeCountyEye hangs up the LakeCountyEye shingle. Who else, your LakeCountyEye asks, will think of the operatives?

Your LakeCountyEye wishes all problems were as simple as yours. One could do worse than take a hint from this savvy state's attorney:
The Lake County State’s Attorney's office has confirmed that it is also investigating claims of misconduct in District 46. Violations of the district's ethics policy, however, would not be under the jurisdiction of that office. That requires an internal investigation, officials said.
Lawyer hired to investigate ethics complaints against Dist. 46 officials
Just three simple words to memorize: Not my job!

And if that don't throw cold water on a boiling teacup, just remind your teapartybase that the damnfools who they FOIAed were other Republicans:
The Party to a Crime
Nuff said!

If you are an elected official, or a previously elected official, or just a private citizen under indictment, send your political questions to Q the Eye c/o ... LakeCountyEye@gMail.com

Friday, May 13, 2011


The big-tools for big-oil over at the McHenryCountyBlog were eager to pass along some big news:
Remember all the hype about Global Warming being the reason for frog and other amphibian deaths? Man made climate change was the cause. It turns out that man's actions may have caused the die-off, but it seems to be because man brought a species of African frog with a skin disease to the New World.
Frog Die-Off Traced to Fungus, Not Climate Change, Global Warming
Ha ha, the mass frog die-off has nothing to do with global warming. It's all because of some frog with a fungus and a Kenyan birth certificate that illegally got into this country. Therefore Global Warming is a media-fed hoax and doesn't exist. The end.

The McHenryCountyBlog is to Internet blogging what AOL dial-up is to 4G. So, no big surprise, what the McHenryCountyBlog reported as breaking news had been widely known for at least 4 years. According to The Sunday Times, from back-in-the-day in 2007 ...
Conservationists estimate that 170 species of frogs have become extinct in the last two decades and fear another 1,900 are on the way out. Many of them have been killed off by the chytrid fungus which is thought to have emerged from Africa to spread to every continent except Antarctica.
Deadly fungus threatens mass extinction of frogs
This of course doesn't dissuade the McHenryCountyBlog from pointing to the frogs as a straw-man proving that Global Warming is junk science.

Speaking of straw-men, hopefully yours was nailed down. Two days after the frog story, the McHenryCountyBlog reported a funnel cloud spotted in McHenry County:
In Case You Didn’t Have TV On
Will the McHenryCountyBlog ever connect the dots between Global Warming and funnel clouds before it's too late? Or is the McHenryCountyBlog to connect-the-dots what Pakistani Intelligence is to Osama Bin Laden?

Stay tuned!

Thursday, May 12, 2011

Thanks Governor Quinn!

A recent video arrived over the transom, c/o operatives at the Illinois College Republican Federation:
The Illinois College Republican Federation wrote a satirical piece thanking Gov. Quinn and IL Democrats for their job crushing policies. We've never done anything like this, and the message is very timely and important. We would love if you could feature this on your site or feature some College Republicans to help get our perspective on the issue out there.

Illinois' College Graduates Send Strong Message to Governor Quinn
Your LakeCountyEye would advise future Illinois College Republican operatives to obtain their college degrees in business administration or computer engineering -- at least something more marketable than political science or media studies or videography. Otherwise you, too, may be pressing Uncle Governor Pat Quinn to take pity and find you a job. Just sayin!

Look for your LakeCountyEye living at home with mom and dad.

Wednesday, May 11, 2011

Avon Township Cuts Annual Operating Budget by 22%

Sam Yingling
Tom Brust
Got this one off of the wires this afternoon.  You just do not see this all too often!!!!  Good on you Avon Township.

At its monthly meeting on Monday May 9th, 2011, the Avon Township Board voted to cut its annual operating budget by approximately 22%. This reduction goes into effect immediately.

These spending cuts – made in collaboration with Avon Township Highway Commissioner Tom Brust –follow a measure by the Avon Township Board in December 2010 to cut its tax levies by approximately 7.2%. The largest spending reduction comes from the Highway Funds by approximately 30%, followed by the Township funds by approximately 5.8%.
“Since I’ve been Highway Commissioner I’ve been able to reduce expenditures, renegotiate various fees and service agreements, as well as eliminate unneeded spending and taxation,” stated Avon Township Highway Commissioner Tom Brust.   Much of the reductions come from the beginning of the phasing out of the Road and Bridge levy. “Commissioner Brust and I agree that the Road and Bridge levy is archaic and must be abolished. We have already begun that process and hope to eliminate this tax in the next levy cycle, “ Yingling further stated, “Additionally, these spending cuts puts Avon Township on the right footing to reduce other levies next year.” Yingling stressed that cuts were made without any reduction in Township services.
“It’s incomprehensible to me that Avon Township is one of only a few local governing entities that are reducing taxes. I commend those taxing entities that also reduced their levies or at the least froze them. I do call into question those entities that opted to increase their levies during these difficult times. Other taxing bodies in Lake County either don’t understand the financial burden facing our residents or are afraid to make the tough decision to get-by with less. To me there’s no option, especially when you consider the huge cash reserves that some of these entities have such as the County and other Townships,” Yingling concluded.

Tuesday, May 10, 2011

Pec's Badboys

A head's up to Illinois's congressional delegation: there is new softcoreporn to be found on the Internet, and his name is Aaron Schock. Readers of this blog will recall that Schock is Illinois's most eligible unmarried bachelor Senator/Congressman -- and has the sartorial chops to prove it:

A Not-Gay Republican Illinois Congressman
Schock's latest bodice-ripper is a cover gig on the metrosexually oriented Men's Health Magazine:

The Ripped Representative
Schock, no doubt, was inspired to bare his sixpacks by a former colleague, the so-called Craigslist Congressman. For operatives with short recall, this is the upstate New York Congressman who posted semi-nude pictures of himself on Craigslist (presumably not to sell a refrigerator). He has since been forced into retirement, after battling a history of teh stupid:


Illinois's Senators & Congressmen are asked to take note. The ladies are allowed to look too!

BONUS: Querulous operatives with a bone to pick are challenged to spot the LakeCountyEye Double Vision™ cleverly hidden in this post. OK, it's not exactly like finding Waldo -- but what do you want for free?

Saturday, May 7, 2011

Down for the County

Operatives who have their home pages pointing to the Lake County government website -- www.lakecountyil.gov/ -- are going to have to wait some more to surf their web. The website, that went down on Friday, is -- as of this posting -- still down. The Daily Herald has the sad details ...
The Lake County website remains temporarily unavailable. County officials say they are aware of the problem and are working to restore the website as quickly as possible. The county says it recognizes the timing of this website interruption coincides with Lake County residents receiving their property tax bills in the mail. Those wishing to pay their tax bill online by e-check or credit card, should use the following link: https://www.illinoisepay.com/epay/GetSite?cmd=get&siteId=50

Lake County website unavailable
If your LakeCountyEye remembers correctly, last year Lake County refurbished its totally oldschool Web-1.0 website. At a cost to taxpayers of about a half million dollars. Cough.

As a service to operatives, your LakeCountyEye polled the tech geeks at some nearby discount big box stores for answers. Unfortunately none had any idea when the site would be functional again. However there were quite a few opinions on what caused the site to crash -- and crash hard. Here are ten:

Ten Reasons Why the Lake County Government Website is Still Down
  1. Site taken down to scrub mail servers in anticipation of FOIA requests.

  2. Hits from the projected 90,000 new county residents crashed the site.

  3. Webserver housed at undisclosed secure site in Abbottabad.

  4. DOS attack initiated by warlike McHenry County.

  5. "Why wouldn't it be down? Mother's Day weekend is a Federal holiday."

  6. Principle source of power: Zion Nuclear Plant

  7. Raccoons nesting in the data switches.

  8. Every year at this time the website is taken outside for a good airing.

  9. Lake County Sheriff Mark Curran stepping in as interim web administrator.

  10. Someone forgot to renew the domain.

It goes without saying ... you know where NOT to look for your LakeCountyEye.

Friday, May 6, 2011

The Party to a Crime

As political corruption crime sprees go, this one would make Lincoln roll over in his grave. The transgression in question is the illegal use of public resources by elected officials for political gain. Props go to the amateur Inspector Clouseaus over at the McHenryCountyBlog, who are following this tale of a political crimewave breaking in your LakeCountyEye's own backyard:
You may remember that the Special Prosecutors of McHenry County State's Attorney Lou Bianchi spent $225,000 we know of looking into the alleged use of official resources for Bianchi's political benefit. I believe Quest Consultants International examined over 5,000 emails and found less than ten that were of a political nature. One I remember was from a web hosting company that was told to use a non-government email address to communicate. Special Prosecutors Henry Tonigan and Thomas McQueen argued that Bianchi assistant Joyce Synek was running Bianchi's campaign out of the courthouse. In cross examination of former Criminal Division Chief Nichole Owens, testimony was elicited that Synek's campaign roll was baking cookies. In Grayslake, from the email published by McHenry County Blog so far (see "The Grayslake School Board Incumbents' Campaign (Email) Trail" – Part 1, Part 2 and Part 3), there is a much stronger case to be made.
Lake County State’s Attorney Looking into Grayslake School Board Members Campaign Emails
Recent, FOIAed documents suggest that elected officials on the Grayslake District 46 School Board may have used public school e-mail resources for re-election purposes this year. As the McHenryCountyBlog notes, the documents contain striking similarities with charges filed against nearby McHenry County State's Attorney, Louis Bianchi. Bianchi was charged with misusing official State's Attorney e-mail resources to help his re-election campaign. Another similarity is that Bianchi is a Republican. The elected officials in question on the Grayslake District 46 School Board (who were defeated in April) are also Republicans.

Whether this will be investigated as a simple copycat case or reveal a broader Republican criminal conspiracy is unknown. Your LakeCountyEye does know that the Republican brand as the law-and-order Party may have been tarnished. This is underscored by the fact that the Rockefeller Republicans over at TeamAmerica10th reacted quickly to throw the fellow Republicans under the bus:
My pal and local blogger Paul Mitchell has done a yeoman's job of blowing the whistle on some very serious issues of apparent improper use of government resources for a local school board campaign, as well as outing what looks like at least discussions of the ramifications of skirting campaign finance laws.
Local Blogger Paul Mitchell Blows Whistle On Dem School Board Campaign Shenanigans in Grayslake D46
The seriousness mentioned above is underscored by the mistake in the title of the post, where TeamAmerica10th misidentifies the school board members as "Dems" -- an atypical gaffe for a blog that parses its words with a lawyer-like scrutiny.

The FOIAed documents also include correspondence with high-ranking Republican elected officials, who your LakeCountyEye is quite sure, would just rather see this story disappear down the memory hole. Time will tell. Stay tuned to this blog for further developments.

Tuesday, May 3, 2011

Double Vision™: The Three-peat

With nothing exciting lately to talk about around the precinct-office watercooler, bored operatives are turning in desperation to your LakeCountyEye for their daily diversion. To put it bluntly, they want more LakeCountyEye Double Vision™ mashups and they want them now.

As readers of this blog are bifariously aware ...
Double Vision™
a Double Vision™ is a hand-crafted & hilariously funny Internet Separated-at-Birth post appearing infrequently on this blog. But alas, at the moment the LakeCountyEye joke-box contains nothing but cricket chirrups -- and operatives hoping for a new Double Vision™ are going to have to wait.

But fret not. Your LakeCountyEye will divulge the secret of how-to construct a Double Vision™. Operatives can enjoy hours of DIY busy-time, building their own Internet Separated-at-Birth mashups on their government-issue computers.

Step #1: Screen-Cap Someone's Web Page

The first thing needed is a target image -- some person or issue of interest is recommended. News outlets are a good destination for material, Fox Chicago News, for instance, has some stories about the Zion Nuclear Plant. Now hijacking content from an Internet news operation is technically a violation of copyright law. Your LakeCountyEye recommends hot-linking an image that has already been hijacked by some other website. A good source of hijacked screen-caps are the free-for-all libertarians over at the McHenryCountyBlog:

Looking at Zion's Nuclear Power Plant
Step #2: Find a Funny Foil

Next, find a companion image that will make your target look silly. Your LakeCountyEye recommends Google Images, and searching on Homer Simpson. Homer is not only good for a sure-fire laugh, but there will be plenty to choose from. Sticklers for detail will point out that this, technically, is stealing as well. But -- and this is a bonus -- no one is likely to waste their time tarnishing the Simpons brand by going after some backwater blog with a cease-and-desist order.
Step 3#: Copy and Paste

Now the fun begins. Paste the two images together and, voila, instant jocularity!

Lawmakers Tour Zion Nuclear Plant

It's fairly obvious, of the three, Homer is meant to be Joe Walsh. How Mark Kirk & Robert Dold are supposed to line up against Lenny & Carl is anybody's guess.

Monday, May 2, 2011

Double Down on Double Vision

It is what every blogger dreads: a protracted slow-news cycle. And none within memory have been slower than the week just past. Since there is nothing current or on the horizon to write about, your LakeCountyEye will use the opportunity to comment on a rumor about this blog that has been cutting a Shermanesque swath through cyberspace.

The rumor is true, this blog used to post under a different name. Back when it was known as the McHenryCountyBlog, this blog was the target of a defamation suit filed by a local news organization (that will remain nameless). Reacting like any red-blooded blogger to a threat of legal action, this blog immediately shut down all operations, changed IP addresses, and recrudesced as your LakeCountyEye. And the rest is history. The end.

Operatives who do not believe frankly tall tales of this nature are asked to refer to this hilarious, past, encore Double Vision™ posted by your LakeCountyEye, back in the day, when under the sobriquet of the McHenryCountyBlog:

Having Fun in Springfield
A head's up to bloggers -- both n00bs and wannabes -- peeping in: this would be a textbook example of an Internet Separated-at-Birth gag. The idea is to poke some fun at a target (in this case State Senator Pam Althoff) by juxtaposing their image against a completely unrelated image (in this case The Cowardly Lion) -- for comedic effect. It is the choice of the unrelated foil to your target that makes or breaks the gag. Please note: same age, same expression, same hair stylist -- now there's comedy!

Sunday, May 1, 2011

Double Vision

Operatives looking for bargains on Internet sites like Groupon.com and SitesLikeGroupon.com need look no farther than your LakeCountyEye. For the next 24 hours only, operatives visiting this site are eligible to redeem a once-in-a-lifetime two-for-one offer.

The Fine Print: This two-for-one offer is actually a feeble seque for another installment of your LakeCountyEye's hilarious but infrequent Double Vision™ feature -- where a JPEG of someone famous is compared with a JPEG of some other famous person, whereupon infrequent hilarity ensues. As of press time, however, your LakeCountyEye has not actually found any funny photos to publish. Operatives are asked to please enjoy instead these funny photos from other local blogs and websites.

The part-time stringers at TeamAmerica10th have posted their hommage to your LakeCountyEye -- all the while having fun at the expense of a local office seeker:

Bob Dold Pulls Liberal Opponent In IL-10,
But He's No Secret Agent
Here Ilya Sheyman, Young Gun™ & candidate for the 10th Congressional District, is compared with David McCallum -- while hilarity ensues. Ha ha.

Now your LakeCountyEye does not want to seem ungrateful for props given, of any sort, but isn't McCallum something like 100 years old? It will be the 22nd century before Willard Scott sends Sheyman his 100th birthday greeting. Your LakeCountyEye would've gone with comparing McCallum with fellow octogenarian & Young Gun™ emeritus Robert Dold.



Just sayin'!