Thursday, March 28, 2024

Mad as a March Hare

Today's quiz is a fill-in-the-blank question, and was suggested by the Lake County GOP:
Q: You can never have too many _______?
The correct answer is GUNS.

The Lake County Republican Party is promoting another gun raffle. This time in Gurnee:

The gun raffle is this week, on Holy Thursday (Easter 2024).

A spokesman for the Lake County GOP said: "Have you ever been to an Easter egg hunt, only to go home empty handed? Next time don't disappoint your kids. You just can't go to a hunt of any sort without adequate firepower, so pick up a rifle and maybe a handgun at the Holy Thursday gun raffle.  Then bring those new firearms to your next Easter egg hunt -- I will guarantee that those Easter eggs will be dropping like clay pigeons!"

Saturday, March 23, 2024

Minus Signs

Anyone who thinks the GOP does not raise women up on a pedestal is sadly misinformed. When quizzed about MCU superpowers, MAGA voters overwhelmingly say they want to have X-ray vision.

Those MAGA bros would also need X-ray vision, if they voted at this Lake County poll last week. Who were the GOP candidates? No one knows. The GOP yardsigns were all stacked together tighter than pancakes at a $17 Easter brunch:
Note to GOP Ops: You're doing it wrong. Use that Republican yardsign to block your opponent's signs, instead.

Tuesday, March 19, 2024

Identity Politics

Sharpeyed operatives say this is not Mark Shaw. Who knew? Not your LakeCountyEye:
If Mark Shaw is the former Chair of the Lake County Republicans. And if Mark Shaw is a 2024 convention delegate for former legitimate businessman and former U.S. President Donald J Trump. Then who is the guy with the gun between Joe Walsh and the missus?

The overcompensating fellow in the picture is obviously a boomer-aged white male.  Very likely a second amendment advocate, and to all appearances a MAGA voter.

And your LakeCountyEye would hazard to guess that he is opposed to women's rights, and to immigration, and to vaccines.

So who is this guy? Quite possibly Lake County backbench State Rep, Martin McLaughlin:
Note to Ops: If it looks like Donald Duck, quacks like Donald Duck, waddles like Donald Duck, etc., etc., then it must be Donald Duck.

Thursday, March 14, 2024

Eat and Run

food is good
In Lake County, any politician who does not campaign on lunch bucket issues risks being handed their lunch. So it should come as no surprise that backbench State Rep Martin McLaughlin says inflation is making your grocery bill way too high:
McLaughlin on inflation in Illinois: 'Things are tough for people and there's no relief in sight'
And if McLaughlin has his way you will need to buy plenty of those groceries to feed a growing family. That's because Martin McLaughlin is anti-choice:
Each election cycle the Right to Life McHenry County puts out a list of candidates that support their pro-life position so voters can elect representatives that reflect their values. We're proud to say that Marty is on that list!
And be prepared to secure a loan before buying those groceries. Martin McLaughlin wants a sales tax on your grocery purchases:
Mayors slam Pritzker’s proposal to eliminate grocery tax
Note to Ops: Be sure to clip those grocery coupons. They not only lower the cost of your groceries, but your grocery tax as well.

Sunday, March 10, 2024

The Pillow Fight

Breaking News: Easter Sunday 2024 has been cancelled nationwide. The Alabama Supreme Court just ruled that Easter eggs are children.

HaHa. Nowadays, couples who want to raise a family are going to have to go about it the old fashioned way -- with pillow talk. One local expert on pillow talk is Lake County backbench State Rep Martin McLaughlin. Here McLaughlin is seen consorting with the pillow guy, Mike Lindell: Martin McLaughlin is anti-choice. Which means McLaughlin would deny any woman the freedom to make her own reproductive decisions. So if you buy a pillow from McLaughlin, be prepared to carry it all the way home -- even if it is full of bull feathers.

Wednesday, March 6, 2024

Illusion Fields

Full Faith and Credit shall be given in each State
So there was a guy who liked to hike through the Forest Preserves, while wearing nothing -- except his virtual reality goggles. He didn't want to see any biting flies.

HaHa, the Lake County Forest Preserves are going all-in on AI:
The Lake County Forest Preserve District is using artificial intelligence to enhance the user experience for visitors to its website.
How AI is helping Lake County forest preserves engage with the public
Are the Lake County Forest Preserves in urgent need of some electronic sprucing up? Or would that be gilding the lily? Discuss in the comments.

In related news, someone hacked into the Forest Preserves computers and installed Flight Simulator. The Waukegan Airport was unavailable for comment.

Friday, March 1, 2024

Go for the Green

green eggs and ham
Question of the Day:
Lake County will spend a million dollars to resurrect an old dinosaur. Does that mean Lake County is rebooting Jurassic Park?
No. It is for the Route 53 Extension Greenway.
HaHa. The News-Sun says ...
Land once acquired to expand Illinois Route 53 is to be turned over to the Illinois Department of Natural Resources (IDNR) to prepare to open the "greenway" for public use, after Gov. J.B. Pritzker included $1 million for the conservation project in his proposed budget.
Governor’s budget includes $1M for Lake County ‘greenway’
Then someone at the Waukegan Airport issued a statement: "We will earmark that $1,000,000 to defray our legal expenses when the Waukegan International Airport annexes the Route 53 Greenway for the runway expansion."