Sunday, September 30, 2012

Take It From Peter

Lake County Republican & Ladies Man Congressman, Peter Roskam, wants your vote, ladies. According to Roskam's new mailer, he wants to help with the cost of your daughter's college tuition -- or as is often the case nowadays, her mother's college tuition:

"Peter Roskam worked to pass a bill with bipartisan support to
prevent student loan interest rates from doubling this summer
Roskam has been "working across party lines" for you, ladies, no doubt because every lady appreciates a congressman who knows how to get to yes by giving that special liaison what they need.

Of course it goes without saying that laws and sausages are two things you do not want to see being made. As Deputy Whip, Roskam successfully whipped up enough party votes to pass a Student Loan Bill in the Republican House. But bipartisan support did not seem to be a priority. While the President vowed to veto the Bill, it was rejected by the Democratically controlled Senate. According to CBS News:
The measure passed by a vote of 215 to 195, with only about a dozen Democrats supporting the bill. Most Democrats opposed the bill because its $6 billion price tag is paid for by repealing the Prevention and Public Health Fund -- a fund that would provide for hundreds of thousands of screenings for breast and cervical cancer.
House passes student loan bill
This tale, however has a happy ending. With the expiration date for Student Loan guarantees approaching, cooler heads ultimately prevailed. A Senate version of the Student Loan Bill, one that did not defund women's health screening, was ultimately sent to the President's desk and signed.

Ladies, Peter Roskam -- who knows a thing or two about legislation and sausages -- has your backs.

Friday, September 28, 2012

Petition, Campaign, Repetition

Use only black or blue ink.The frost is on the LakeCountyEye pumpkin already. And operatives know that the last week of September -- with only 40 days left before the Presidential election -- clearly signals that is it time: It's that time again, to get on the ballot for the 2013 election!

Haha, the Municipal & Township elections are just around the corner -- April 9, 2013 -- and the last filing date for ballot nominees is December 24. The petition period already began last Tuesday, so what are you waiting for?

If you're not decided on what to run for, there are plenty of ballot offices waiting to be had by anyone with the wherewithal to get those 20 or 30 minimum required petition signatures -- while everyone else is frittering away the time Trick-or-Treating or Christmas shopping or cooking-up a Thanksgiving feast or some other junk.

Your LakeCountyEye counts at least ten high offices up for grabs in the upcoming 2013 election:

Ten Desirable Offices on the Lake County 2013 Municipal Ballot
  1. Gambling Czar
  2. Backyard Poultry Inspector
  3. International Election Observer: Southeast Wisconsin Circuit
  4. Public Sector Pensioner
  5. Route 53 Extension Director of Tolls
  6. County Comptroller of $3000 Bonuses for Township Assessors
  7. Undercover Sheriff's Deputy: Department of Libertyville Wind Farms
  8. Municipal Featherbedder
  9. Game Warden: Burmese Python Division
  10. Unbelievable Lake County State's Attorney

Look for your LakeCountyEye, in 2013, challenging your petition.

Wednesday, September 26, 2012

Where's Walsho?

Haha, Lake County's trickster Congressman, Joe Walsh, is at it again with some of his old tricks. According to NBC Chicago, quoted verbatim and unedited here ...
Rep. Joe Walsh, Tea Party-Ill., is giving a lucky constituent a free trip to California -- to see his opponent, Tammy Duckworth. Yesterday, Walsh sent out this Tweet: ONE HOUR LEFT to enter to win the RARE opportunity to see. @Tammy4Congress speak in #CA. Donate $3 here to win:
Walsh Gives Away Trip to California -- to See Duckworth
Operatives are advised not to moneybomb Walsh's website with donations -- because some chumbalone or other has already won, and no doubt at this moment is at JCP's, shopping totally California casual.

Here's an actual excerpt from the Walsh campaign press release:
Where's Tammy? If you're like us, you're having a hard time figuring out where Tammy Duckworth is.
Win a Trip to Meet Tammy Duckworth… In LA!
It's a well-known fact that the Walsh campaign steals all of their ideas from your LakeCountyEye. This particular idea was lifted from a post on this blog from way back in March ...
Where's Walsh? Although his new district is Schaumburg, Walsh, according to his website, will be campaigning in Barrington Hills:
Where's Walsh?
It goes without saying that monkeyshines -- like information -- wants to be free.

The indisputable photographic evidence is in this screencap lifted directly from the NBC Chicago website:
Move along, there is nothing else to see other than this hilarious LakeCountyEye Double Vision™!

Saturday, September 15, 2012


that's tragicTheater reviews are not ordinarily posted here. But your LakeCountyEye is a huge fan of the performing arts -- and the Lake County Kabuki Theater is now appearing in Buffalo Grove with performances of Antigone. Their interpretation of the ancient Greek classic is titled Lisagone and features some local talent. Former Buffalo Grove mayor Sid Mathias has the role of King Creon; the current Buffalo Grove Trustees stand in as the Greek Chorus; and former Buffalo Grove Trustee Lisa Stone has the title role, Lisagone.

The print media has nothing but rave reviews:
Pressure on Mathias over Stone

Mathias publicly severs ties with former Buffalo Grove trustee

Mathias distances self from Stone
A spokesman for the Lake County Kabuki Theater explained that some of the dialog was liberally reworked to give the Sophocles play a contemporary feel:

King Creon didn't abandon me when I stood up for the people, and didn't sell my soul for power. Instead, I went the distance and stayed true to my oath. Thank you, Creon, for having the integrity and courage to follow your beliefs.
King Creon has been asked repeatedly to declare where he stands. Is he in league, as she claims, with the person who holds the ignominious distinction as the only elected official in state history to be recalled from office? This is not an academic inquiry. It is a matter of his reliability, credibility and judgment. It directly calls into question his capacity to adapt to changing circumstances and his ability to make sound decisions. The continuing silence from him is deafening. And it is telling as well.
I do not support Lisagone. There is no collaboration between us. I have never supported her political agenda nor her methods or behavior at the royal palace. She is not now, nor has she been, affiliated with my campaigns for many years. Furthermore, I have told her repeatedly not to use my name in her statements and blogs.
Lisagone can be seen in Buffalo Grove through the November election. And scheduled for the 2012-2013 season is the Lake County Kabuki Theater's revival of the Shakespeare comedy, Adieu, Gentlemen of Motorola.

Thursday, September 13, 2012

Bad Signs

best miniature golf in the worldAccording to their eponymous website ...
Starting Spring 2012, the Bettendorf Castle will be hosting private group tours. We invite you to take a tour of the exterior of the beautiful, historic Castle grounds.
The Bettendorf Castle
The castle is easy to find: just look for the Dan Duffy yardsigns. Your LakeCountyEye has learned that there are no less than four Duffy for Senate yardsigns waiting to greet visitors at the Bettendorf Castle.

While those signs may earn Duffy some votes out of the next tourbus from Racine, they may have the opposite effect on voters from the neighborhood. According to the Daily Herald ...
To the dismay of its neighbors, public tours of Bettendorf Castle in Fox River Grove could resume soon after a ruling by a McHenry County judge on Wednesday morning. Fox River Grove officials had argued the village code does not allow bus tours in residential areas, and the matter ended up in court after castle owner Michael Strohl was issued a zoning ordinance violation notice in August.
Judge OKs tours of Bettendorf Castle
There is an art to placing a yardsign. A yardsign in a Lake County roundabout, for instance, will get your campaign scores of repeat views from confused motorists as they drive in circles. But just about anyone who knows which end goes into the ground can plant a yardsign where it will get seen. The art is in placing that sign where it doesn't goad others into voting for your opponent.

To get you started, your LakeCountyEye has identified ten toxic locations to avoid:

Ten Places in Lake County Where Not to Put a Yardsign
  1. Land & Lakes Landfill
  2. In Front of a Red Light Camera
  3. Blarney Island
  4. At a SWALCO Collection Event
  5. Along the Route 53 Extension
  6. Blocking an Awesome Outdoor Display of a Homeowner Against Lighting Ordinances
  7. On the Mundelein Free-Range Chicken Ranch
  8. The DiMucci Property
  9. In Front of an Ed Sullivan Yardsign
  10. Gracing the Frontlawn of a Lake County Sheriff Foreclosure Eviction

Look for your LakeCountyEye -- where else? -- stealing your yardsign.

Saturday, September 8, 2012

The Ladies Man Cometh

How do you spell Courvoisier?They say in politics, if you have a problem hang a lantern on it. For Lake County's ambitious Congressman, Peter Roskam, make it a candygram.

Roskam, only in his third term, is already the 4th ranking Republican in Congress, Deputy Majority Whip. But his meteoric rise, as readers of this blog are astronomically aware, comes at at a price:
Q the Eye/09.02.12
As Deputy Whip, Roskam is responsible for advancing his Party's legislative agenda -- an agenda that increasingly has had consequences on a woman's health and her freedom to make reproductive decisions. The House GOP's so-called War on Women -- where Roskam has been a loyal footsoldier -- negatively impacts the same suburban voters that he represents. It's not a surprise that Roskam's most recent campaign lit targets suburban women ...
Chick Lit
portraying him as a leading advocate of women's issues in Congress.

Will Roskam's charm offensive secure him another term in the US House? Here is the nutgraf from a recent Letter to the Editor nodoubt sanctioned by the Roskam campaign:
Whether in person, during Tele-Town Hall meetings or through his video conversation series 'Ask Peter', he is accessible and eager to listen. As a result, he is well-equipped to truly represent us
Peter Roskam is Well-Equipped to Truly Represent
The message is clear. Those unsure whether Peter Roskam deserves their support are invited to see for themselves: Contact the Roskam campaign and "Ask Peter" how "well-equipped" he is for the job.

Friday, September 7, 2012

When Dating a Waukap, Go To Waukegan
Because the Waukapalooza There

The Summer of LoveIn the 1700s, when the Native American Waukapalooza migrated here, they settled along the banks of Lake Michigan in what is now Waukegan. Legend has it they recognized the site as a good location for an Indian Casino.

Haha j/k.

Greetings from sunny Waukegan, where your LakeCountyEye is live blogging Waukepalooza 2012. Waukapalooza, it goes without saying, is Waukegan's rip-off of answer to Chicago's successful Lollapalooza music festival.

Operatives eager to make the scene at this year's 2012 Waukapalooza should hop on the bus to:
Stiner Pavilion
Waukegan Beach
Sat, Sept 8
3pm to 10pm
The musical line-up includes:
  • Fatal Intoxication
  • Evil Twin Sister
  • Jeremy DeJesus
  • The Slutty Squirrels
  • Somnistatic
  • Parallels & Lies
  • The Whales?
Doubtless they must've thrown out the rule book when it comes to finding that perfect name to get your band some notice. Your LakeCountyEye recalls back in the day when his record label made Frank Zappa change the name of his band from The Mothers to the more commercially appealing The Mothers of Invention.

But that was back in the day. Your LakeCountyEye made some calls to the RIAA and their copyright division says there are only about 10 good unclaimed band names left. If you're a future Marilyn Manson, take note:

Ten Bitchin Awesome Names for Your Lake County Band
  1. The Millburn Stranglers
  2. The Rose Exterminators
  3. The Fox River Valley Gardeners
  4. Dan Duffy and His Red Light Cameras
  5. Homeowners Against Lighting Ordinances
  6. John Philip Waukapasousa
  7. The Scraunch Lads
  8. Land & Lakes & the Landfills
  9. Joe Walsh Tribute Band
      featuring Joe Walsh!
  10. The Willards

Look for your LakeCounteye, tuning the ukelele.

Wednesday, September 5, 2012

Return of the Tin Man

David McSweeney, who lost to Melissa Bean in 2006, now hopes to be elected to Illinois House District 52.

The District, which had been represented by the late Mark Beaubien, includes some of the most affluent municipalities of and near western Lake County: Barrington, Barrington Hills, Inverness, Lake Barrington, North Barrington, South Barrington, Tower Lakes. This has not deterred McSweeney from running on a jobs platform:
The caption on one McSweeney mailer, above, says ...
Enough TALK about creating jobs,
Hire someone who will DO IT.
and shows a picture of McSweeney presumably in the act of creating jobs. It is not exactly clear what jobs McSweeney is creating.

McSweeney's own bio states he has
worked as an investment banker, financial consultant and currently as an investment specialist
The photo, however, shows McSweeney in a machine room, inspecting some unidentified mass produced items. Is McSweeney promising to create manufacturing jobs? The real question then is -- what sort of manufacturing job? Tin Foil Hats?

Sunday, September 2, 2012

Q the Eye/09.02.12

Dear LakeCountyEye,

I've been serving in Congress, nonstop, since 2009. I'm good looking and ambitious and photogenic. And I'm still not President. Or Governor. Or something. What's the trick for someone like me to get ahead?

Shocking Pink
Dear Peter Envy,

Ὥρος HōrosThere's no trick to it. Just follow the lead of one suburban Congressman who has served since 2007. This Congressman, who will go unnamed, is already his party's the fourth-ranking Republican leader, their Chief Deputy Majority Whip.

The trick to this still unnamed congressman's success is an old tried and true formula: raise a lot of money to help other Republicans get elected to Congress who will reciprocate by helping you rise up in their leadership.

There's no trick to raising a lot of money. As readers of this blog are richly aware, you can use your Congressional franking privilege to pay for your campaign advertising:
A Frank You Letter

Chick Lit
All those campaign contribution dollars saved can then be used to support the election of other candidates -- like being the featured speaker at a fundraiser for State Rep candidates in Muscatine IA:
MUSCATINE, Iowa — The fourth-ranking GOP member of the U.S. House of Representatives gave local Republicans a look on Saturday at how their party is doing things under the dome in D.C. today, while a junior GOP delegate took them under the dome in Des Moines for a glimpse of the future.
Local Republicans raise funds and rally support
Haha, that was not a typo. This unnamed Congressman is raising money for State Rep candidates in Muscatine IA -- not Mundelein IL. He can already count on the support of the other Illinois Congressional Republicans. So don't expect to see this unnamed Republican Congressman in someplace like Mundelein raising money for an Ed Sullivan or a Sandy Cole any time soon.

You do the same and you'll be Speaker of the House faster than you can say John Boehner.

If you are an elected official, or a previously elected official, or just a private citizen under indictment, send your political questions to Q the Eye c/o ...

Saturday, September 1, 2012

Misprint Journalism?

BFFsOne more sign the days of old media are numbered: the old Pioneer Press -- the gray lady -- Lake County's newspaper of record -- is getting an extreme makeover, courtesy their owners at the Sun-Times. And as if to show they are serious in their extremity, the Sun-Times hired away from the Northwest Herald Chris Krug to oversee the transition:
For the past six months — through focus groups, hundreds of street interviews and direct contact with our readers — we have been in an open dialogue with our readers in an attempt to create the best possible local news experience for you.
More than just a new look
It is unknown what those focus groups, street interviewees and readers asked to see in a new, extreme-made-over Pioneer Press. One thing may be certain, they did not ask for journalistic accuracy: Your LakeCountyEye was surprised to read in the Pioneer Press that U.S. Rep. Robert
Dold and U.S. Rep. Jan Schakowsky, an Evanston Democrat, face off in November for the newly redesigned 10th District Congressional seat.
Northwest suburban residents take aim at federal debt
If their goal is to create media buzz for themselves, the new Pioneer Press is advised to sponsor some campaign debates between Jan Schakowsky and Robert Dold. Your LakeCountyEye would pay money to see that.

One note to jilted Northwest Herald readers: Chris Krug may be gone. But the Herald's exceptional journalistic standards have followed him cross-town to the Pioneer Press.