Friday, April 12, 2024

A Dox on Your House

This is dedicated to each Lake County voter who is experiencing an identity crisis. You know who you are.

The Lake County Gazette has published the names, addresses, birth dates of every Lake County registered voter:

Needless to say, that is enough information to steal your identity. The Illinois Attorney General is investigating:
The State Board of Elections has asked Attorney General Kwame Raoul to consider legal action against the publisher of far-right faux newspapers and websites for publishing personal information about Illinois voters.
State elections board asks AG’s office to look into publisher of fake newspapers for printing voter data
Being Lake County's #1 fakenews source, the Lake County Gazette deploys web bots to generate much of its content.

Note to Ops: There are many reputable services available that promise to monitor, alert, and assist in preventing or recovering from identity theft.
Identity theft
Just Sayin!

Sunday, April 7, 2024

Heliophobia

sunlight is the best disinfectant
Anyone driving down to see the eclipse might want to leave their Tesla in the garage. None of those solar charging stations will be of much use to you.

One solar facility in particular will be of no use to one Lake County community.  Hawthorn Woods residents successfully stopped a solar farm from going up in their backyards:
An application for a proposed commercial solar farm site along Fairfield Road in Hawthorn Woods has been withdrawn. The village's recent annexation of the property is being challenged in court.
Public hearing on proposed commercial solar facility near Hawthorn Woods canceled as village annexes property
When asked if the Waukegan Airport will annex the property, a spokesman said: "No. The last time we annexed a solar farm, the first electric jumbojet that went up ran out of batteries at 30,000 feet."

Tuesday, April 2, 2024

April is the Foolest Month

AI Deepfake
Breaking news: Reliable sources tell your LakeCountyEye that April Fool's Day has been moved forward to April 2, at least for the current year.

Who knew? Not your LakeCountyEye. Mark your calendars. It's not every day that your horometrical overlords fool around with April Fool's Day.

In related news, a truck did not crash into the Long Grove covered bridge. And the Waukegan Airport did not annex any public land. And no one was baked at the Mundelein cannabis festival.

The McHenry County Man who did not shoot himself in the foot was unavailable for comment.

Thursday, March 28, 2024

Mad as a March Hare

Today's quiz is a fill-in-the-blank question, and was suggested by the Lake County GOP:
Q: You can never have too many _______?
The correct answer is GUNS.

The Lake County Republican Party is promoting another gun raffle. This time in Gurnee:

Lake County IL GOP

The gun raffle is this week, on Holy Thursday (Easter 2024).

A spokesman for the Lake County GOP said: "Have you ever been to an Easter egg hunt, only to go home empty handed? Next time don't disappoint your kids. You just can't go to a hunt of any sort without adequate firepower, so pick up a rifle and maybe a handgun at the Holy Thursday gun raffle.  Then bring those new firearms to your next Easter egg hunt -- I will guarantee that those Easter eggs will be dropping like clay pigeons!"

Saturday, March 23, 2024

Minus Signs

Anyone who thinks the GOP does not raise women up on a pedestal is sadly misinformed. When quizzed about MCU superpowers, MAGA voters overwhelmingly say they want to have X-ray vision.

Those MAGA bros would also need X-ray vision, if they voted at this Lake County poll last week. Who were the GOP candidates? No one knows. The GOP yardsigns were all stacked together tighter than pancakes at a $17 Easter brunch:
Note to GOP Ops: You're doing it wrong. Use that Republican yardsign to block your opponent's signs, instead.

Tuesday, March 19, 2024

Identity Politics

Sharpeyed operatives say this is not Mark Shaw. Who knew? Not your LakeCountyEye:
Keep on Trumpin'
If Mark Shaw is the former Chair of the Lake County Republicans. And if Mark Shaw is a 2024 convention delegate for former legitimate businessman and former U.S. President Donald J Trump. Then who is the guy with the gun between Joe Walsh and the missus?

The overcompensating fellow in the picture is obviously a boomer-aged white male.  Very likely a second amendment advocate, and to all appearances a MAGA voter.

And your LakeCountyEye would hazard to guess that he is opposed to women's rights, and to immigration, and to vaccines.

So who is this guy? Quite possibly Lake County backbench State Rep, Martin McLaughlin:
Note to Ops: If it looks like Donald Duck, quacks like Donald Duck, waddles like Donald Duck, etc., etc., then it must be Donald Duck.

Thursday, March 14, 2024

Eat and Run

food is good
In Lake County, any politician who does not campaign on lunch bucket issues risks being handed their lunch. So it should come as no surprise that backbench State Rep Martin McLaughlin says inflation is making your grocery bill way too high:
McLaughlin on inflation in Illinois: 'Things are tough for people and there's no relief in sight'
And if McLaughlin has his way you will need to buy plenty of those groceries to feed a growing family. That's because Martin McLaughlin is anti-choice:
Each election cycle the Right to Life McHenry County puts out a list of candidates that support their pro-life position so voters can elect representatives that reflect their values. We're proud to say that Marty is on that list!
Twitter
And be prepared to secure a loan before buying those groceries. Martin McLaughlin wants a sales tax on your grocery purchases:
Mayors slam Pritzker’s proposal to eliminate grocery tax
Note to Ops: Be sure to clip those grocery coupons. They not only lower the cost of your groceries, but your grocery tax as well.

Sunday, March 10, 2024

The Pillow Fight

Breaking News: Easter Sunday 2024 has been cancelled nationwide. The Alabama Supreme Court just ruled that Easter eggs are children.

HaHa. Nowadays, couples who want to raise a family are going to have to go about it the old fashioned way -- with pillow talk. One local expert on pillow talk is Lake County backbench State Rep Martin McLaughlin. Here McLaughlin is seen consorting with the pillow guy, Mike Lindell: Martin McLaughlin is anti-choice. Which means McLaughlin would deny any woman the freedom to make her own reproductive decisions. So if you buy a pillow from McLaughlin, be prepared to carry it all the way home -- even if it is full of bull feathers.

Wednesday, March 6, 2024

Illusion Fields

Full Faith and Credit shall be given in each State
So there was a guy who liked to hike through the Forest Preserves, while wearing nothing -- except his virtual reality goggles. He didn't want to see any biting flies.

HaHa, the Lake County Forest Preserves are going all-in on AI:
The Lake County Forest Preserve District is using artificial intelligence to enhance the user experience for visitors to its website.
How AI is helping Lake County forest preserves engage with the public
Are the Lake County Forest Preserves in urgent need of some electronic sprucing up? Or would that be gilding the lily? Discuss in the comments.

In related news, someone hacked into the Forest Preserves computers and installed Flight Simulator. The Waukegan Airport was unavailable for comment.

Friday, March 1, 2024

Go for the Green

green eggs and ham
Question of the Day:
Lake County will spend a million dollars to resurrect an old dinosaur. Does that mean Lake County is rebooting Jurassic Park?
Answer:
No. It is for the Route 53 Extension Greenway.
HaHa. The News-Sun says ...
Land once acquired to expand Illinois Route 53 is to be turned over to the Illinois Department of Natural Resources (IDNR) to prepare to open the "greenway" for public use, after Gov. J.B. Pritzker included $1 million for the conservation project in his proposed budget.
Governor’s budget includes $1M for Lake County ‘greenway’
Then someone at the Waukegan Airport issued a statement: "We will earmark that $1,000,000 to defray our legal expenses when the Waukegan International Airport annexes the Route 53 Greenway for the runway expansion."

Sunday, February 25, 2024

Don't Bet on It

Don’t push your luck. Pull it.
Today's Question of the Day is a story problem:
Q: The 2024 Presidential horse race has left the gate, and Ron DeSantis already came in dead last. Would DeSantis have done better in that horse race if he had four legs?

A: If Ron DeSantis had four legs, he'd be working for Disney.
HaHa, Lake County Moneybags Richard Uihlein bet a million dollars on Ron DeSantis. And lost:
A billionaire couple from Lake Forest who are among the nation's top Republican donors gave more than $1 million to Florida Gov. Ron DeSantis' failed bid for the presidency in the final three months of 2023, federal records show.
Uihleins spent more than $1 million on DeSantis’ presidential campaign in fall — will they now back Trump
This would not mark the first time that Richard Uihlein dropped a bundle on an also-ran. In 2022, he gave $3,500,000 to Darren Bailey's failed gubernatorial campaign. And Uihlein, that same year, pumped $1,000,000 into an effort to stop a Constitutional Amendment -- the Illinois Right to Collective Bargaining. That ballot referendum sailed to victory by 17 points.

In related news, the Lake County GOP issued an urgent plea: "Please consider making a donation here in Lake County. We will have plenty of loser candidates on the primary ballot in March."

Tuesday, February 20, 2024

Saturday Night Special Cartoons

The McHenry County man who shot himself in the foot was outdrawn last week. By the Creepy Tribune Cartoonist:
Will there be more mash-ups for the Chicago Tribune Creepy Cartoonist™ and the McHenry County Man Who Shot Himself in the Foot™ any time soon? Not likely. One McHenry County MAGA man told your LakeCountyEye: "They bus in their pen-men from Chicago to make renditions of our Second Amendment patriots. And they bring with them their diseases and their crime into McHenry County. We need to build that paywall now."

Thursday, February 15, 2024

Ash from a Hole in the Ground

beautiful clean coal
Question of the day:
Q: How rich is rich?

A: Rich is when you donate your Tesla to Kars4Kids because the ashtray is full.
HaHa, the City of Waukegan's ashtray is full. With coal ash:
As Midwest Generation seeks modification of its handling of coal ash at its decommissioned Waukegan power plant from the Illinois Pollution Control Board, it is reconsidering its earlier proposal to cap one coal ash pond and remove the other. Local officials, including Waukegan Mayor Ann Taylor, have pushed Midwest to remove both ponds. State Sen. Adriane Johnson, D-Buffalo Grove, and state Rep. Rita Mayfield, D-Gurnee, introduced legislation in the Illinois General Assembly requiring removal.
Coal ash ponds the subject of Pollution Control Board hearing; 'Waukegan residents deserve better'
You can add toxic coal ash to the list of expensive environmental messes in the upper right corner of Lake County. Waukegan Mayor Ann Taylor said ...
the company has refused to cooperate with the city removing the pollution its coal furnaces have spewed for nearly a century. Waukegan already has five Superfund sites from other polluters in its industrial past, much of it along the lakefront. "The residents of Waukegan cannot bear the financial cost of yet another environmental catastrophe caused by a private company," Taylor said "This company is failing to address its environmental mess adequately. Waukegan residents deserve better."
Coal ash ponds the subject of Pollution Control Board hearing; 'Waukegan residents deserve better'
The Waukegan Airport quickly released a statement: "No, the Waukegan International Airport will absolutely not be annexing the coal ash for its runway expansion. Whatever gave you that idea?"

Saturday, February 10, 2024

School of Hard Knocks

CRTs are radioactive. Always use LED monitors.
How about a quick run of fantasy football before the Super Bowl?

This is the line up: Your quarterback is the Antioch Village Trustee who wants to direct school policy even though she does not sit on the school board:
Trustee Petrina Burman began objecting last year to certain materials dealing with gender identity being made available to students in Antioch School District 34. That sparked an investigation by an outside agency. The citizens group and Burman have since taken to social media to express their viewpoints.
Antioch officials want to focus on plans rather than gender-identity debate; ‘This is … a distraction from getting these projects completed’
Suddenly there is a wide opening far downfield:
Lake Zurich Community Unit School District 95 is accepting applications from candidates to fill a school board vacancy.
Lake Zurich Dist. 95 seeking applicants for school board vacancy
Is this an opportunity to pick up a seat on a school board?  Not so fast --  applicants must reside in the school district. This means that Antioch Village Trustees are ineligible and would need to find other means to exert their influence. Perhaps by waging a social media campaign against that school district.

Hike!

Monday, February 5, 2024

People Unclear on the Contempt

not to put too fine a point on it
Did you hear the one about the candidate who filed a nominating petition for school board? However, she failed to check her paperwork. And was elected village trustee instead. HaHa, true story.

One Antioch Village Trustee was so unhappy with her school district that she took to social media in a big way:
Trustee Petrina Burman began objecting last year to certain materials dealing with gender identity being made available to students in Antioch School District 34. That sparked an investigation by an outside agency. The citizens group and Burman have since taken to social media to express their viewpoints.
Antioch officials want to focus on plans rather than gender-identity debate; ‘This is … a distraction from getting these projects completed’
Things became embarrassing to a degree that the Village Board censured their Trustee:
Antioch trustees have reprimanded one of their own, saying it's time to move on from social media distractions and focus on village business.
Antioch village trustee censured for ‘disruptive’ conduct
Note to Ops: You can exert more influence over school district policy by sitting on that school board. And not your village board.

Just sayin!