Rhymes with June or Moon

The big off-year consolidated election primary election is finally over, and if you're like your LakeCountyEye then you've been on the edge of your seat waiting to learn who will replace Jesse Jackson Jr. If that is you, wait no longer -- here is an actual un-retouched screen-cap from the actual un-retouched Daily Herald story:

Anti-gun Democrat ashoo-in to replace Jackson Jr.

Elections of course raise more questions than they answer. The question burning the breast of every LakeCountyEye operative, to a man, is now ...

What is an ashoo-in?

No candidate going by the name "Ashoo-In" appeared on your LakeCountyEye's 2nd Congressional District tip sheet.

And Google is of no help -- the best it could do was a circular reference back to the Herald:

Google

The word ashoo-in plays the pivotal role in the first joke that ever got a laugh for your LakeCountyEye, from a live audience:

• KNOCK KNOCK
• WHO'S THERE?
• ASH
• ASHOO?
• GESUNDHEIT!

Haha, that one still cracks up your LakeCountyEye.

It turned out that Rosebud was Citizen Kane's sled. Your LakeCountyEye would not be surprised if ashoo-in was just another unexpected non-sequitur that no one ever could have guessed anyways.

Google

Spoils System Alert!

Just when you thought it was safe to surf the blogosphere again, Island Lake -- a community of friendly people -- is back in the news. A mayoral election is, technically speaking, scheduled to be held in Island Lake. However given recent ballot objections and legal maneuvering, it is hard to tell what will happen in Island Lake come the election in April.

As readers of this blog are unexcitedly aware ...

Scoop du Jour

it was disclosed that an Island Lake village contractor and political ally to the United for Progress political slate was the signer on a ballot objection filed against the opposing political slate, For the People. Predictably, For the People was not amused, and made sure the print media knew about it.

Well, haha, it now turns out that David McArdle, a Crystal Lake-based attorney for For the People, donated his expenses as an in-kind. Predictably, United for Progress was not amused -- and for the benefit of the Daily Herald:

When asked if the donation was part of an effort to become the village's lawyer, McArdle said the Crystal Lake firm would like to be considered for the job. "If the slate is fortunate enough to win and be placed into office, and if the new mayor solicits new law firms, we will happily apply," he said. "For the People" trustee candidate Mark Beeson denied the donation is part of a political quid pro quo.
Law firm donated $6,000 to Island Lake candidates

Operatives, of course, are well aware that these sort of campaign monkeyshines go on all of the time. The campaign technique is a time-honored tradition that goes back to Andrew Jackson: trade goods and services and donations from your supporters for the promise of government jobs after the election.

So as a service to local candidates, your LakeCountyEye has identified ten sweetheart government positions you can offer your backers & volunteers in exchange for their support. In a non-quid-pro-quo way, of course!

So You Plan to Win? Ten Patronage Jobs for Your Campaign Supporters

Don't tip that parking valet. Promise him the job of Highway Commissioner. Sell your home for a big markup. Appoint your realtor to Property Assessor. Short on cash for a sixpack? Tell that 7-Eleven® clerk you can promote him to County Clerk. A tip from the NRA: your neighbor -- the one who likes to show-off his concealed carry -- would make for a perfect school crossing guard. Is there an unfilled trustee position that no one wants? Appoint your trusty canine companion. BONUS: If your dog is named Rusty he would need to be addressed as Trustee Rusty. Two words: Park District Now you're talking real money! Who doesn't have a lazy offspring that has been unemployed since Circuit City went bankrupt? Make him your Clerk of the Circuit Court. If all that bigmouth in-law of yours wants to talk about is young earth creationism, then get him something to do and appoint him to your school board. Reward that generous contributor. Make his son, the lawyer, the State's Attorney. Finally, don't be surprised if Lake County Board Chair, Aaron Lawlor, shows up to measure the drapes.

Look for your LakeCountyEye, on the government dole, near you.

Closed Primary

A little known fact was recently brought to your LakeCountyEye's attention. Did you know that there is a Primary Election on February 26? That would be like on Tuesday, which is a day or two from now. Your LakeCountyEye did not know that!

Despite the fact that there is a primary this week, there are no actual elections scheduled in Lake County. Except for a couple that no one knows about. And of those, there is only one anyone knows about: the primary election for Waukegan Mayor.

The Mayoral candidates, in alphabetical order, are:

• Sam Cunningham
• Terry Link
• Wayne Motley

Plus some YouTubes, which your LakeCountyEye found by accident while searching for public-domain gangnam footage:

Sam Cunninham - 2013 Mayoral Candiate Interview


Terry Link - 2013 Mayoral Candidate Interview


Around Your Town Wayne Motley Interview for Mayor of Waukegan

By your LakeCountyEye's calculation, 2013 is an off-year. The only time to look for fewer voters at the polls in an off-year election would be at an off-year primary to an off-year election. Factor in that monster lake-effect snow-storm predicted for Tuesday, and your LakeCountyEye expects the voter turnout in Waukegan at somewhere near the low negative single-digits.

All of this means is that the Waukegan Primary election is already over. Whoever had the best early-vote GOTV effort has already won.

Your LakeCountyEye, for one, plans to stay home Tuesday & tighten up the moves.

Forbes Better Or Forbes Worse

The big Lake County story this weekend that everyone is talking about comes from Forbes magazine. The popular business magazine, and monger of attention-grabbing lists, ranks Lake County at #140 among the Best Places for Business and Careers:

Best Places for Business and Careers

Haha, j/k. The big story is that Forbes magazine ranks Lake County at #9 among America's Most Miserable Cities. Like everyone else, your LakeCountyEye's initial reaction was:

What, Only Ninth?

Haha, j/k again. Like everyone else, everyone's reaction was:

Isn't Lake County a -- erm -- County?

Your LakeCountyEye must admit that as governmental bodies in the State of Illinois go, Cities and Counties are totally different things. Totally. But, not being Forbes magazine, what does your LakeCountyEye know?

Forbes gives some boilerplate reasons for including "Chicago suburb" Lake County in their Internet Top Ten List:

#9 Lake County, Ill.
The Chicago suburb is one of the richest counties in the U.S., as measured by per capita income. But home prices are down 29% over the past 5 years. Other drawbacks: long commutes and lousy weather.
America's Most Miserable Cities 2013

True enough. Sometimes it takes your LakeCountEye more than an hour to get through one of Lake County's roundabouts. Also, naming Lake County as one of America's Most Miserable Cities is sure to be a shot in the arm for housing prices here. But as far as the weather goes, remember what everyone always says:

If You Don't Like The Weather in Lake County ... Go To Hell.

Your LakeCountyEye suspects that Forbes lumped the non-municipal Lake County together with the likes of Rockford, Gary, Detroit, Flint, Stockton, Toledo, Camden and other municipal train-wrecks, to sell more of their magazines in one of the richest counties in the United States. If nothing else, this tells your LakeCountyEye that they don't sell any of their Forbes magazines over in McHenry County.

As they say, in politics, if you have a problem hang a lantern on it -- Lake County ought to incorporate and become the Village of Lake County. Your LakeCountyEye likes the idea. Taxpayers would be trading a county tax obligation for a much lower municipal tax obligation. And if nothing else, your LakeCountyEye could hope to stop being called for jury duty.

In related news, Lake County Board Chair, Aaron Lawlor, has announced that he will be a candidate for Mayor of Lake County.

Psych!

Your LakeCountyEye has a winner!

As readers of this blog are remotely aware ...

Q the Eye/11.03.12

this blog has been an accessible & lucrative platform for merchants eager to promote their products through the magic of embedded marketing. At the same time, operatives are under a standing challenge to spot the subliminal product placement when one appears on this website.

Well, operatives were quick to spot the subliminal ad posted earlier this week ...

Q the Eye/02.18.13

This ad in particular was placed to drive traffic to OnlinePsychologyDegree.net which, about as far as your LakeCountyEye can tell, wants you to enroll in a psychology program at an online university like University of Phoenix or Kaplan University.

The operatives who are under the impression that the ad is actually for Scientology are mistaken. Obtaining an online psychology degree is nothing like becoming a Scientologist. The two things are totally different. A degree in online psychology is much more like pursuing psyops where, according to Wikipedia, the objective is to ...

convey selected information and indicators to audiences to influence their emotions, motives, objective reasoning, and ultimately the behavior of governments, organizations, groups, and individuals.
Psychological Operations (United States)

Totally different than Scientology. Totally.

If this sounds like the job description of an operative, then that goes a long way toward explaining why LakeCountyEye ops disproportionately have advanced degrees in online psychology programs. Your LakeCountyEye is betraying no secrets to admit that there is a good living to be made for a blogger just by secretly marketing other people's products on some crappy website. In fact your LakeCountyEye just cut a huge deal with a Chicago-based Fortune-500 Company -- huge enough that your LakeCountyEye is thinking about early retirement. If you have a product that needs some exposure, contact your LakeCountyEye immediately and ask for a rate-card. You will not regret it. And just to demonstrate the power of subliminal marketing -- you no-doubt have not noticed but there is a nationally recognizable Fortune-500 Company product surreptitiously embedded in this very post. Operatives are challenged to spot the hidden ad -- a tasty, freshly baked confection is on reserve for some lucky winner!

Oysters Rockefeller

Frequent commenter Louis G. Atsaves is in the news. The Moraine Township GOP Chair is in the news courtesy a press release it looks like he sent to the News-Sun:

Moraine Township Republicans will hold a candidate appreciation night from 6 to 8 p.m. Feb. 27 in the Hemmingway Banquet Room at Miramar Bistro & Bar, 301 Waukegan Ave., Highwood. The reception is to honor the candidates who appeared on Moraine Township ballots on behalf of the Republican Party. The annual Moraine Township Republican Spartan Award to a Moraine precinct committeeman or precinct captain will be announced. Tickets are $25 per person, which includes hors d'oeuvres, cash bar and valet parking. For reservations contact Louis Atsaves, Moraine Township GOP chairman, louisgatsaves@gmail.com or atsaves@aol.com by Feb. 24. Make checks payable to North Shore Republicans.
Moraine GOP

Atsaves's fundraiser is beyond the shadow of any doubt for a worthwhile cause and, were it not for a court-ordered confinement to home detention, your LakeCountyEye would be attending.

Happily, your LakeCountyEye does have Internet access, and was able to peruse the menu -- which, along with the valet parking, looks anything but Spartan!

Miramar Bistro

At $25 per head, that is cheap at twice the price!

Your LakeCountyEye had intended to post a link to Atsaves's blog -- Common Sense in Illinois' 10th -- but won't. Despite some heroic Googling, your LakeCountyEye found no mention of the event there, and may just have scooped Atsaves's widely unread blog on his own fundraiser!

All things notwithstanding, save one of those claws for your LakeCountyEye!

Q the Eye/02.18.13

Dear LakeCountyEye,

How can you tell when a Lake County politician is lying?

Straight Man

Dear That's Not Much to Brag About These Days,

When his lips are moving.

Haha, j/k. However, there was one operative who got in the habit of doing a shot of bourbon every time he heard a politician lie. He died a happy man, your LakeCountyEye recalls.

Of course knowing for certain when someone is telling the truth or lying is a valuable life skill that few possess. If you are among the unskilled, fret not. It is a little known but well documented fact that modern science has made great strides in the field of tergiversation and now understands with near 100% accuracy why and how people lie. And so can you. One knowledgeable operative sent a helpful webwidget that your LakeCountyEye is willing to share for your personal edification:

Why People Lie

Now, one doesn't need to be a Biblical scholar to know that the Father of Lies is the Internet. Were it not for a finely honed skill for instantly discerning fact from fiction, your LakeCountyEye would not be your high paid & nationally read political blogger. Operatives can scroll down to the bottom of the widget to learn what the pros use to spot an online liar:

ONLINE LIARS TEND TO ...

• Avoid using the word "I" as much as possible.
• Use negation, i.e., saying "not sad" rather than "happy".
• They try too hard to be honest, prefacing things with phrases like "to be honest".

Erm ...

... heh heh ...

... cute.

For the record & in all honesty, your LakeCountyEye is not amused.

If you are an elected official, or a previously elected official, or just a private citizen under indictment, send your political questions to Q the Eye c/o ... LakeCountyEye@gMail.com

The Metamorphosis

Operatives with the staying power to watch last week's State of the Union Address may have noticed 6th District Congressman Peter Roskam sitting up-close and personal with one Congressman Paul Ryan:

Paul Ryan is in the House

Those ops who did were not alone; the two macho-conservative Congressmen were sitting close enough for the Washington Post to take notice:

Peter Roskam, Paul Ryan’s wingman

And your LakeCountyEye certainly took notice of the two good-looking Congressmen, as readers of this blog are handsomely aware:

A Valentine's Day Massacre

A Wisconsin Congressman, Paul Ryan was the GOP's unsuccessful 2012 vice-presidential candidate. Ryan also is an unabashed fan-boy of Ayn Rand. According to Wikipedia ...

At a 2005 Washington, D.C. gathering celebrating the 100th anniversary of Ayn Rand's birth, Ryan credited Rand as inspiring him to get involved in public service. In a speech that same year at the Atlas Society, he said he grew up reading Rand, and that her books taught him about his value system and beliefs. Ryan required staffers and interns in his congressional office to read Rand and gave copies of her novel Atlas Shrugged as gifts to his staff for Christmas. In his Atlas Society speech, he also described Social Security as a "socialist-based system". In 2009, Ryan said "What's unique about what's happening today in government, in the world, in America, is that it's as if we're living in an Ayn Rand novel right now. I think Ayn Rand did the best job of anybody to build a moral case of capitalism, and that morality of capitalism is under assault."
Paul Ryan

Ayn Rand is credited with inventing Libertarianism, the political philosophy that contends that government is evil. Rand disseminated her radical views in some influential anti-government novels like The Trial and The Castle.

Paul Ryan Ayn Rand This may look like a double entendre, but you're actually enjoying another hilarious LakeCountyEye Double Vision™!

How much of Ryan's anti-government Libertarianism will rub off on Lake County Congressman Peter Roskam? While Roskam likes to portray himself as a moderate Republican, your LakeCountyEye suspects he has already completed the metamorphosis.

Waukegan Candidates Debate

A loyal reader sends us a reminder of a debate scheduled this weekend:

What:
Waukegan Candidates Debate

Where:
Park Place
415 S Lewis Ave
Waukegan

When:
Sunday, February 17
1:30pm

Who:
Three candidates for Waukegan Mayor and five candidates for Waukegan City Clerk are expected to be present.

Sponsors:
Waukegan Area Branch of AAUW
League of Women Voters - Lake County

Another friendly reminder, the Illinois Consolidated Primary is Tuesday, February 26. And early voting has already started. You can vote early through Saturday, February 23.

What are you waiting for?!

The ReCycle Spin

Two days ago Mark Curran announced unexpectedly that he will not be a candidate for Illinois Attorney General. Your LakeCountyEye can report that, as of the close of Day Two, Curran has not changed his mind about that, yet. Watch this blog for further bulletins, as events warrant.

Haha, as readers of this blog are redundantly aware ...

Flippertigibbets

The News-Sun reported that Mark Curran kicked off his re-election campaign for Lake County Sheriff with a public announcement:

"During the past couple of months, I have thoroughly explored a possible run for Illinois attorney general, which included talking to many people around the state and prayerful reflection and consultation with family and friends," he said Wednesday. "I have decided to run for re-election for Lake County sheriff."
Sheriff Curran drops attorney general bid

Curran explained his sudden flip-flop, telling the Daily Herald ...

"prayerful reflection," along with consultation with family and friends, led him to change his mind and pursue his third, 4-year term as Lake County sheriff. "I have great clarity," Curran said of his decision. "I have great peace."
Lake County sheriff to seek reelection to another term, not a run for attorney general

If operatives have that eerie feeling of déjà vu all over again, they are not alone; Curran has a history of changing his mind in this fashion. Those operatives eager to know when the next flip-flop will occur may refer to this scientific flowchart:

In the interim, look for your LakeCountyEye at your nearest Lake County roundabout.

Flippertigibbets

Not since the first flying asian carp was reeled in from out of Lake Michigan has Lake County witnessed this much naked flip-flopping. Your LakeCountyEye of course refers to Mark Curran's snap announcement that he will seek re-election again for the office of Lake County Sheriff. As readers of this blog are mistakenly aware ...

Son of Yet Still Even More Curran Events

Curran signalled last December that that he was considering a bid for Illinois Attorney General and would not be seeking re-election as Sheriff.

But that was then. The Daily Herald now reports ...

Lake County Sheriff Mark Curran says he's changed his mind about seeking statewide office and wants to return for a third term in his current job. Curran, a Republican from Libertyville, announced Wednesday he'll seek re-election in 2014 and not run for attorney general. He said "prayerful reflection," along with consultation with family and friends, led him to change his mind and pursue his third, 4-year term as Lake County sheriff. "I have great clarity," Curran said of his decision. "I have great peace."
Lake County sheriff to seek reelection to another term, not a run for attorney general

None of this comes as any surprise to your LakeCountyEye. Curran is storied for his history of flip-flops. He switched parties early in his first term. He recently did a complete one-eighty on his public immigration position.

In December, when it appeared that an unbeatable Lisa Madigan would seek a third term, Curran was looking at a green light to challenger her for the office of Attorney General. That green light however recently changed to red. This is a clear indicator that Madigan will not seek re-election, and instead will run in 2016 for Governor. An open Attorney General seat represents a real pick-up opportunity for the Illinois GOP -- and party bosses don't want to squander this opportunity on an untested sheriff from the far north burbs.

Your LakeCountyEye will you keep you informed of new turns as soon as they occur. If there is anything certain, it is that Curran will change his mind again.

A Valentine's Day Massacre

Here your LakeCountyEye blogs, broken hearted. Readers of this blog are erroneously aware ...

Dunn Deal

that your LakeCountyEye has been and is the numero uno wingman for 6th District Congressman, Peter Roskam. Well, it's been a sham -- your LakeCountyEye has been living a cruel cruel lie.

The truth is too painful to endure: operatives are advised to read the Washington Post tell-all for themselves:

Those wondering what Paul Ryan thought of President Obama's State of the Union would do well to ask the lawmaker who has been serving as the Wisconsin Republican's wingman throught the presidential address — Rep. Peter Roskam (R-Ill.). Roskam, like Ryan, is a young rising star within House GOP ranks. He was seated next to Ryan at the House GOP leadership table on the right-hand side of the chamber, and the former GOP vice-presidential nominee turned to him more than a dozen times through the State of the Union to comment on the president's remarks.
Peter Roskam, Paul Ryan’s wingman

Your LakeCountyEye does not know what is more coldhearted -- to learn the truth from an Internet blog or on Valentine's Day.

And just who is this Paul Ryan person?

Paul Ryan is in the House

Your LakeCountyEye learned that he ran for Vice President once and lost -- like the loser he is.

Your LakeCountyEye has also been told that Paul Ryan is some extremist Libertarian who wants to do what all extremist Libertarians want to do -- get rid of Medicare and Social Security, kill funding for education, schools and women's health programs, and legalize marijuana.

An open letter from your LakeCountyEye, sent direct, from the heart to Peter Roskam: you promised to be the 6th Congressional District ladies man. You're better than that whatsisname.

Paternity Suit

Just when operatives thought they were out ... they pull your LakeCountyEye back in.

Haha, one-term-and-ex-congressman Joe Walsh is in the news again, this time courtesy the Sun-Times:

Walsh, a flame-throwing Tea Party Republican who was trying to land a radio deal and last week announced he was forming a new conservative SuperPAC, filed court papers seeking to end his obligation to pay $2,134 per month in child support. But once again, Walsh insists he's no deadbeat. Both he and his attorney say that since he is no longer employed as a congressman, they want to "modify" the previous agreement so that he pays 20 percent of his current salary. Walsh is not currently employed and has no salary. But that could change, he said. "I'm working on it," he said.
Ex-Tea Party Rep. Joe Walsh insists he’s not trying to stop paying child support

Nobody's milquetoast, Walsh fired back on one of his websites, WalshFreedom.com:

This article by the Sun Times is a deliberate attempt to defame me, and I will sue them immediately.
I Will Sue the Chicago Sun-Times

Note to operatives: never quit your day job. The bill collector isn't going to wait for that radio deal to catch fire or for the PAC to start churning cash. Sooner or later you'll find yourself looking for some deep pockets to sue.

Israel and Palestine: Paths to Peace

The Stevenson Center will host a program on Israel and Palestine: Paths to Peace:

Adlai Stevenson Center on Democracy

Please join Rabbi Herbert Bronstein and Dr. Issam Nassar at the Stevenson Center on Democracy for our discussion, Israel and Palestine: Paths to Peace. Rabbi Herbert Bronstein is a lecturer and writer in the field of comparative religion. He is a member of the religious faculty of Lake Forest College and senior scholar of North Shore Congregation Israel. Palestinian born Dr. Issam Nassar is a professor of History at Illinois State University. A former Senior Fulbright Fellow, he is an authority on the politics of the Middle East.

• Sunday
  March 3, 2013
  2 PM
• The Stevenson Center on Democracy
  25200 N St Mary's Rd
  Mettawa (Libertyville), IL 60048
  847-816-7433
• $15
• Coffee and conversation following

Scoop du Jour

There's an old saying in the annals of the blogosphere: whether or not you are the scooper or the scoopee depends a lot on which end of the handle you are at. As readers of this blog are handily aware ...

Objectionists

TheBlog1, your LakeCountyEye's bête noire, got the scoop on the story about some prolonged ballot objection drama playing out over in Island Lake -- an objection was filed against a mayoral candidate there, who is challenging an incumbent Mayor.

Well, turnabout is fairplay. The Daily Herald now reports that one of the signed objectors is a political ally of that Mayor, and does business with the Village of Island Lake:

Island Lake records detail activists' financial ties

Your lakeCountyEye is shocked -- shocked -- to learn that business interests and political interests will intersect to help get politicians elected to local offices. Haha, j/k.

They say in the blogosphere: dog bites man is not news, man bites dog is news. The real significance of the Herald story is that -- as of the time of this post -- you are not reading about it on TheBlog1. See for yourself:

TheBlog1

No, you are reading about it here instead, on your LakeCountyEye.

There's an old saying popular around the blogosphere, be nice to bloggers on your way up because you meet them on your way down -- haha, TheBlog1 just got scooped by their bête noire, the LakeCountyEye.

Look for your LakeCountyEye doing the LakeCountyEye victory dance.

Unidentified Disqualifying Objections

Once upon a time in Illinois, if you owed your city or township back taxes all you needed to do was get elected mayor or supervisor and forgive the debt. Those were the days, your LakeCountyEye remembers them well. But then some spoilsport googoo legislators down in Springfield went and ruined all the fun. Nowadays owing money to your town or township is grounds to get you knocked off the ballot. As readers of this blog are dimly aware ...

Objectionists

One candidate for village president in Island Lake is the target of a ballot objection because he hadn't paid his garbage bill. Haha, nice try.

The requirements that need to be met to appear on the Illinois ballot are so arcane and complex that it is a wonder that anyone gets certified to be a candidate. Your LakeCountyEye recalls one prominent candidate who was tossed off a ballot for high office because his birth certificate was issued in Kenya. Your LakeCountyEye does not remember this politician's name, in all likelihood he is presently mouldering on the scrapheap of history. A true story, all the same.

Your LakeCountyEye has read the all the Illinois election laws -- so you don't have to -- and has identified the pitfalls to avoid before submitting your nominating papers. Ten of them, coincidentally:

Ten Common Filing Mistakes that are Sufficient Grounds to Remove a Candidate from the Ballot in Illinois

Petitions Notarized with Chiquita Banana Stickers Candidate's Statement of Economic Interest: 1-800-CASH-4-GOLD Name of Candidate: Princess Nudelman No Currency Stapled to Nominating Papers On Loyalty Oath, Pledges Loyalty to the Orange and Blue Statement of Candidacy was not Phrased in the Form of a Question Insufficient Frequent Flier Miles Someone in the County Clerk's Office Doesn't Like Your Looks Elected Office Sought: Queen of Sheba Petitions Signed by Some Guy Named Barney Baxter

Look for your LakeCountyEye, carrying a blue or black ink pen.

Objectionists

Your LakeCountyEye got scooped -- scooped like a tub of Chunky Monkey^® on the Fourth of July^®. The scooper in this case would be LakeCountyEye bête noire & eponymously named TheBlog1.com.

Petition challenges were filed in the upcoming Island Lake municipal election. The TheBlog1.com has been on it like a $90 suit on a $100 tattoo:

How do you stop this? Write your Illinois state senator and Illinois state representative and tell them you support the elimination of local municipal and township electoral boards. Tell them to move the hearings to the County. This is a prime example, especially where in this case, it took three hearings before any evidence was provided against or for the candidates.
Island Lake Electoral Board a Puppet Show

With the consolidated election scheduled for April, Lake County has seen a bumper crop of petition challenges, as readers of this blog are slightly aware:

Zero Sum Justice

Q the Eye/01.24.13

Petition challenges, in Illinois, are decided by local electoral boards, ad-hoc jurisdictions which lend themselves to obvious conflicts-of-interest. Within the last 30 days, there have been challenges to township slates that were decided by incumbent township board members. Also, an order by fiat issued from the Lake County Building struck one candidate off three ballot slots. And despite an admission of petition fraud, one township candidate will remain on the ballot.

The Daily Herald was not amused and called for the elimination of these local electoral boards:

Island Lake is a political fever swamp. Its residents are in the unfortunate position of watching one slate of candidates fight to get on the ballot while the opposing faction controls the electoral board that is meant to decide — impartially — whether they are eligible.
Editorial: Let's eliminate local electoral boards

Your LakeCountyEye observes that of all the comically biased electoral board decisions that were issued this cycle, the Herald chose as their poster-child example a Community of Friendly People^® -- haha -- Island Lake.

Note to operatives: if it bleeds it leads.

Zero Sum Justice

Not since the US Government dispatched last night's predator drone to terminate with extreme prejudice some hapless schmoe over in the Middle East, has institutional summary justice this callous been observed. Your LakeCountyEye refers, of course, to Willard Helander's successful effort at removing James Creighton Mitchell Jr. from the ballot.

Perennial candidate The hardest working candidate in Lake County, Mitchell had submitted signatures and paperwork to qualify him for four slots on the April election ballot:

• Lake Villa Elementary District 41
• Antioch-Lake Villa Area High School District 117
• College of Lake County
• Lake Villa Library District

Mitchell was on track to score some sort of Lake County ballot hat-trick, that is until Lake County Clerk Willard Helander stopped him with a full-court power play. According to the Daily Herald ...

Knowing Mitchell was pursuing four seats in the April 9 election, Helander sought advice from the Lake County state's attorney's office, which represents her staff. Attorneys advised Helander that simultaneously serving on multiple school boards is a conflict, she said. Helander then reported the potential conflict to the three school agencies, which removed Mitchell from their candidate lists because he hadn't withdrawn from contention by a Jan. 3 deadline.
Lake County candidate knocked off three ballots

Who decides whether or not elected offices are in conflict? Apparently not Mitchell, who did not have an opportunity to contest Helander's ruling. Rough justice? Operatives are asked to decide for themselves.

According to the Illinois Candidate's Guide ...

FILING OBJECTION PETITION:
Nomination papers shall be deemed to be valid unless objections are filed in writing (an original and one copy) within five business days after the last day for filing nomination papers. The objector's petitions are filed with the same office in which the nominating petitions are filed. [10 ILCS 5/7-13, 10-8]
State of Illinois CANDIDATE'S GUIDE 2013

Your LakeCountyEye observes that Mitchell was removed from the ballot without a written objection from anyone.

Also, according to the same guide ...

May a candidate file for more than one office?
Yes, however, he must withdraw from all but one office within five business days following the last day of petition filing, if the offices are incompatible. If he does not withdraw from all but one incompatible office, his name will not be certified for any office.[10 ILCS 5/7-12]
State of Illinois CANDIDATE'S GUIDE 2013

Mitchell was unable to withdraw from any office because he learned the offices were incompatible long after the withdrawal deadline had passed -- and at the time he was removed from all of them.

Note to operatives: serving on these school and library boards is a thankless task. Zero pay gets you an incommensurate amount of responsibility plus facetime with whackadoo single-issue constituents. Does anyone wonder why these positions go unfilled? Your LakeCountyEye thinks Mitchell should have been lauded for taking four one for the team. And not unceremoniously dispatched to the scrapheap of history.

Your LakeCountyEye is not eligible to vote in Lake Villa. But if your LakeCountyEye was -- or if your LakeCountyEye was a wholesale perpetrator of voter fraud -- there would be at least one ballot where every office would have a write-in for James Creighton Mitchell Jr. -- a Lake County hero.

Work Smarter, Not Harder

One of the perks of being elected President of the United States a second time is the privilege of delivering your second inaugural address. Your LakeCountyEye did not attend or even listen to President Obama's final inaugural address -- and will confess being more preoccupied with other business. Three words suffice:

1. Gun
2. Swap
3. Meets

... and ...

1. No
2. Background
3. Checks

Happily, other people did listen to the President's address and they sent letters to their on-line newspaper editors about it. Just so your LakeCountyEye doesn't have to.

One letter writer is Keith Gray. (Gray appears to be a prolific letter writer -- just Google Keith Gray along with the News-Sun or the Daily Herald. Gray also ran for State Senate in District 30 and was defeated. Whether or not correlation implies causation here remains an open question.)

Apparently President Obama mentioned equal pay for equal work in his address, because Gray objected to the concept in the News-Sun:

two people apply for a positions I have open to make widgets. Ninety-five percent of what they'll do is perfunctory, requiring very little training. According to the president, their pay should be equal. However, there may be very important differences in the value of these people within the context of our staff. One is currently employed with glowing references, while the other has unexplained gaps in their resume. One is an excellent listener and communicator, while the other is adequate for the position. One lives close to our office, with the second having to commute from far away. There are countless variables aside from productivity that go into deciding who to hire, and how much to pay, even if it is for equal work. Don't confuse this with equal value.
Equal pay, work

Erm, perhaps your LakeCountyEye is just being a poor reader and communicator -- because your LakeCountyEye would swear that every "difference in value" that Gray cites as an example is a difference that will likely impact present or future productivity. If one hires Goofus & Gallant, isn't Goofus going to be less productive than Gallant? Duh.

The concept of equal pay for equal work is intended to apply to "variables" that do not impact upon productivity -- like differences in things like gender, race, ethnicity, religion.

An example may help to clarify the concept of equal pay for equal work. The Internet, like everything else, is ordered hierarchically like a totem pole. Bloggers sit somewhere near the bottom of that totem pole. In fact your LakeCountyEye can't think of anyone lower on the totem pole than bloggers -- except people who write letters to the editor. But while letter writers sit lower on the totem pole than Internet bloggers, they still can count on equal pay for equal work. Which for both bloggers and letter writers is always zero pay for equal work.

Of course, if you're the boss and you make the widgets, then you have a right to your opinion, regardless of whether or not the opinion holds water. Your LakeCountyEye remains just a simple country blogger.