Friday, December 31, 2021

The Heavenly Heist

Face it. No one ever makes good on their New Year's resolutions. So why not sign up for a LakeCountyEye MasterClass® instead?

Enroll today to be eligible for this week's LakeCountyEye MasterClass:
How to Draw Pictures in the Style of the Creepy Tribune Cartoonist®
Lesson #1
Find some clipart on the Internet:
Lesson #2
Flip the image and then squish it.  Imbue that sketch with some aesthetic street-cred:
Lesson #3
Then copy-and-paste into your picture:
Lesson #4
Now draw a fig-leaf for the Tribune Creepy Cartoonist. He got nothing on you.

Hurry! Supplies are limited.

Monday, December 27, 2021

Which of These People are Behind Bars?

Dick Barr, a Lake County Board Commissioner, alleges that his car was robbed on Christmas Eve. His proof is a porch-cam video of his driveway:
Did Dick Barr file a police report? If not, then why not? If someone broke into your car on your driveway, wouldn't you call the police?

In Chicago there is a code of silence that they call don't snitch:
It's an old problem and an old code — "don't snitch." And it exists everywhere. But in Chicago, where homicides and shootings are up significantly this year, that old code is leaving a rising number of violent crimes unsolved.
In Chicago, Violence Soars And Witnesses Go Silent
But isn't Lake County supposed to be better than Chicago? Shouldn't Dick Barr march right down to the Round Lake Beach Police Headquarters and tell them everything he knows?  If he hasn't already, why hasn't he?

And Dick Barr absolutely needs to show the police the video.  That's because even though Lake County has not seen any snow since last March, the video shows a solid coat of snow on the ground. And Dick Barr, an actual elected Lake County Board Commissioner, will need to explain where all that snow came from.

Because the police aren't stupid.

Saturday, December 25, 2021

Some Guys Belong Behind Bars

Lake County Board Member Dick Barr filed an unbelievable report on social media, claiming his car was burglarized at his Round Lake Beach home, twice on Christmas Eve:
Lake County Board Member Dick Barr posted security camera videos early Christmas Day on social media showing his car being burglarized twice. The security camera video showed a masked suspect getting out of the passenger side of a vehicle and running up to Barr's vehicle that was parked in the driveway of his Round Lake Beach home.
Lake County board member says his car was burglarized twice on Christmas Eve while he was delivering presents
This is a photo from Barr's video:
Now, anyone who lives in Lake County knows there hasn't been any snow on the ground since last March -- unlike what you see in Dick Barr's photo:
Your LakeCountyEye checked the Round Lake Beach weather report:
The temperature there on Dec 24 was a balmy 54 degrees. Precipitation was .02 inches (about average for the Gobi desert).

Source:
Weather History for KILROUND40 (Round Lake Beach)
Your LakeCountyEye suspects the perp got away with a load of baloney.

Friday, December 24, 2021

Sneezin's Greetings

Secret Santa
Did Santa Claus bring a COVID test-kit and put one in your stocking? If Santa had read the label correctly he would have put it in your nose.

HaHa.

There is good news for anyone who lives in Lake County. You are less likely to have COVID than those who live in McHenry County. Twice as less likely as those in Wisconsin:
New cases of COVID-19 in Lake County increased 72.23% in the past week, to 370.4 per 100,000 residents as of Friday, according to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention website. In suburban Cook County, the average is 299.83 new cases, a 62.16% jump. The numbers are more pronounced in McHenry County to the west, with 521.81 new cases per 100,000 residents, a 56.38% increase; and across the state line in Kenosha County, Wisconsin, the average is 821, a jump of 77%, according to the CDC.
Lake County’s COVID cases increase, as it continues to lead state in vaccination rate
The bad news is Santa had been down every chimney in McHenry County before he even flew into your town. And every chimney in Wisconsin as well. So whatever it is that Santa left under your tree, creosote is the least of your worries.

2021 Xmas holiday hack: The Ivermectin you got from your MAGA uncle is FDA approved for use on reindeer.

Tuesday, December 21, 2021

What a Nudge

Is that a gun in your pocket or you just happy to see me?
How bad does hasbeen Lake County favorite son Ted Nugent want to gin up sales for his new CD? So bad, he sent a copy to the President:
TED NUGENT Says He Sent A Copy Of His Latest 'Pro-Gun' Song To President JOE BIDEN
The CD, which contains these lyrics ...
Come and take it
Go ahead and try go ahead and die
comes with high hopes to be a big hit when played at the next State of the Union Address.

In related news, an environmentally conscious Lake County will be banning single-use plastics:
In what was described as a small but important step, the Lake County Board on Tuesday adopted a policy banning the use of single-use plastics at its operations by Jan. 1, 2023.
Lake County Board adopts policy banning single-use plastics by 2023
A County official told your LakeCountyEye: "Absolutely, Ted Nugent's CD will be covered by the ban. Nobody ever listens to a Ted Nugent record more than one time."

Sunday, December 19, 2021

Secret Weapon

Happiness is a Warm Gun (Lennon/McCartney)
There are many revelations yet to be disclosed by the Capitol Riot Investigation. One of the most shocking is that the President has a Secret Santa: Ted Nugent.

HaHa.

Honorary Lake County favorite son Ted Nugent sent one of his songs to Joe Biden for Christmas. Nugent says the ballad ...
is a love song to the punks in our government who think that they have the right to infringe on our constitutionally guaranteed, God-given individual freedoms. So I sent them a love song. In fact, I sent a copy of 'Come And Take It' to [U.S. president] Joe Biden
TED NUGENT Says He Sent A Copy Of His Latest ‘Pro-Gun’ Song To President JOE BIDEN
Come and take it
Come and take it
Go ahead and try go ahead and die
Come and take it


Come and Take It
Ted Nugent
There is no truth to the rumor that Ted Nugent's Secret Santa is a Secret Service agent.

Friday, December 17, 2021

What's the Beef?

... said the three-legged wedding usher.
That sound of a roaring freight train you hear is not a deadly tornado. It is a deadly freight train:
It's 2013 again, only instead of Barrington leading the charge against the Canadian National's acquisition of the EJ & E Railroad, this time several suburbs along the Irving Park Road corridor are organizing to oppose Canadian Pacific's merger with Kansas City Southern.
Suburbanites have till Friday to speak up about rail merger
More trains on the ground will mean more money in the pocket of someone, to say the least.

An industry spokesman told your LakeCountyEye: "Of course, any increase in rail traffic will mean an increase in exploding oil trains. We are taking all the necessary safeguards by installing extra-heavy-duty cow-catchers on all of our engines."

Tyson the Bison, Lake County's runaway buffalo, was unavailable for comment.

Monday, December 13, 2021

Oh Give Me a Home

Uncirculated Condition
Do you have a lost pet? Sadly, the Sheriff's Dept does not have the resources to help. If your pet is an American Bison however, well that's another story:
Authorities said the owner of the animal reported it missing to the Lake County Sheriff's Office in mid-September.
Sheriff warns residents not to approach ‘Tyson the Bison’ which has been on loose for months in Lake County
This lost bison ...
is making a name for herself in the Cary area, an hour northwest of Chicago, with citizens posting photos and videos of her on Facebook, along with jokes and statements of support. A local artist has painted a portrait of the wily bovine — dubbed Billy by her fans.
A runaway buffalo roams the streets of suburban Cary, inspiring social media posts, art and Sasquatch comparisons: ‘Are we dreaming this?’
Going by several aliases -- such as "Tyson the Byson" and "Buffalo Billy" -- the runaway ungulate has eluded capture because no one knows exactly which name they need to to call out. One thing is known, there are ten names the bison does not answer to:
10 Rejected Names for
the Lake County Lost Bison
  1. Joe Blow the Buffalo

  2. Terramycin the Bison

  3. Covid the Bovid

  4. Buffalo Bill Barr

  5. Lice In the Bison

  6. Bueller? Bueller? Bueller?

  7. Buffalo Chip

  8. The Grove Formerly Known as Buffalo

  9. The Notorious B.I.S.O.N.

  10. Yertle the Bison
Look for your LakeCountyEye in Buffalo NY.

Wednesday, December 8, 2021

The Revolution Will Not be Tote-Bag-ized

Question of the Day: Why are Governors Ron DeSantis and Greg Abbott, US Senator Ted Cruz, and US Reps Jeff Duncan, Bill Posey and Lauren Boebert all chanting Let's Go Brandon?

The short Answer:
Let's Go Brandon
is the alt-right's new rebel yell.

It is ...
a euphemism that many people in conservative circles are using in place of saying, "F*** Joe Biden."
Here's what 'Let's Go, Brandon' actually means and how it made its way to Congress
That's right, Let's Go Brandon is your way of giving the middle finger to Joe Biden.

And if you itch to flip off the President, then why not do it with a Let's Go Brandon Tote Bag? You heard that correct, the McHenry County GOP will be giving away Let's Go Brandon tote bags at their next fundraiser:
Just in time for the holidays, why not give a Let's Go Brandon tote bag to that hard-to-shop-for grandparent? Or take one to that next Secret Santa office party? Is there a better way to publicly declare your allegiance to the resistance?

Best of all, these are easy to carry when you're at church or the grocery store or just out caroling. Nothing says "I am an insurrectionist" like your Let's Go Brandon tote bag!

Sunday, December 5, 2021

OMG Omicron

With great power comes great responsibility.
Note to Ops: Run for your lives. The Omicron Variant is coming:
As Lake County awaits first omicron variant case, health officials suggest everyone ‘continue using the same precautions we have been using all along’
One public safety expert told your LakeCountyEye: "Make no mistake, the Omicron Variant is dangerous. But this is no Thanos or Dormammu. As far as Marvel Villains go, I'd rank Omicron Variant somewhere between Doctor Octopus and Green Goblin. No need to call a Spiderman or Wolverine. Captain America would be able to clobber an Omicron Variant."

Your LakeCountyEye will keep you apprised when further developments warrant.

Thursday, December 2, 2021

Motivated Seller

It looks like your LakeCountyEye will not have Joe Walsh to kick around any more:
Former U.S. Rep Joe Walsh sells Mundelein home for $685,000
Ex-Congressman Joe Walsh got notoriety in the early 2010s when he exposed Lake County to the Paranoid Style in American Politics:

Rep. Joe Walsh yells at his constituents
One long-time political scientist told your LakeCountyEye: "It's too bad that you can't copyright your shtick. Walsh would be a gazillionaire today."

Sunday, November 28, 2021

Tough Guy

He is a former anti-abortion lobbyist. State Senator Daniel McConchie now wants you to go to jail:
 
Illegal abortions are guaranteed to be on the rise this year. Dan McConchie says ...
this year rising crime rates will be even deadlier!!

Women who need an illegal abortion brazenly thumb their noses at the law. While McConchie condemns those who ...
work insidiously to lift up the lives of felons and those with no respect for rule of law

Women who receive illegal abortions are criminals who should be kept in jail. And McConchie strongly opposes ...
efforts to allow prisoners to walk out of jail without bail

Lock them up!

Wednesday, November 24, 2021

Turkey Shoot

I'll give you my gun when you pry it from my cold dead turkey.
BREAKING NEWS: Thanksgiving has been cancelled in Lake County.

Armed with an AR-15 military-style assault weapon, the Thanksgiving Turkey this week gunned his way out of the turkey farm.

The Thanksgiving Turkey was subsequently apprehended. But despite being in illegal possession of a lethal firearm, and despite admitting to the use of deadly force, a jury acquitted the Thanksgiving Turkey of all charges.

One jury spokesman said it was a clear-cut case of self-defense.

The whereabouts of the Thanksgiving Turkey is currently unknown.

Your LakeCountyEye will keep you apprised when further developments warrant.

Saturday, November 20, 2021

High on the Tokin' Poll

Buy Low, Sell High
Heads up. Is one marijuana joint enough for the Village of Lake Zurich? Maybe not:
Just two weeks after Lake Zurich leaders voted to allow the village's first marijuana dispensary, a new group pitched a plan to build the second.
The Village of Lake Zurich hears plan for second marijuana dispensary
By the same token, it looks like the Village of Lake Zurich might be on a roll. Village approval ratings are flying higher than a kite:
The village of Lake Zurich was given its highest marks yet in several categories by residents participating in the biannual community survey, with 96% of respondents rating their town as a good or excellent place to live.
Lake Zurich receives high marks from residents in community survey
What possibly explains a 96% approval rating?  Your LakeCountyEye obtained a copy of the survey to find out what residents are saying about the Village of Lake Zurich. All ten of them:
10 Most Frequently Heard Responses
to the Lake Zurich Community Survey
  1. Totally Awesome

  2. Rad

  3. Cowabunga

  4. Gnarly

  5. Most Excellent

  6. Primo

  7. Bitchin

  8. Tubuler
  9. 5 Yelps  

  10. Da Bomb
That's all your LakeCountyEye has. Smoke'em if ya got'em.

Monday, November 15, 2021

When the Going Gets Tough the TIF Get Going

the gift that keeps on giving
Note to Ops: Cue the snow. Santa Claus is coming to Lake County:
Santa will jump-start the holiday season when he arrives via firetruck Saturday night at the Deer Park Town Center. His visit coincides with the annual tree-lighting and fireworks display.
Santa's on his way to Deer Park
What is hiding in Santa's sleigh-full of gifts? A TIF district for Deer Park:
Deer Park officials may create a special taxing district to raise money for public improvements and to encourage development in its part of the Rand Road commercial corridor.
Deer Park weighing special taxing district on Rand Road to boost development
A spokes-elf issued a statement from the North Pole: "Santa made a list and checked it twice. All you naughty Deer Park schools, libraries and parks are getting a lump of coal this year."

Thursday, November 11, 2021

Creeping Stagnation

An actual unretouched screengrab from the Lake County Gazette, Lake County's #1 fakenews source:
"Number of teachers pledging to teach Critical Race Theory in Fox Lake stagnates at one"

In related news, the number of journalistic ethics observed at the Lake County Gazette dissipates to zero.

Saturday, November 6, 2021

Explosive Material

Boom Boom Boom Boom / I'm gonna shoot you right down / Right off your feet / Take you home with me / Boom Boom Boom Boom
The Lake County exploding oil train did not explode. And the Lake County ethylene-oxide cloud did not explode either. Nor, for that matter, did the Lake County nuclear plant, nor the Lake County mosquito abatement truck.

So, what did explode in Lake County last week?
There is no question many northern Lake County residents either heard or felt something Friday afternoon. But what it was remains a mystery. At about 3:30 p.m., emergency dispatch centers began getting reports of what sounded like a large explosion.
'It sounded like a bomb going off': Loud boom heard Friday in Lake County remains a mystery
Note to Ops: Has anyone seen Kyle Rittenhouse's ammo dump?

Tuesday, November 2, 2021

Laughter is the Best Medicine

The enervated theocrats at the McHenryCountyBlog are blaming the Democrats for the high cost of Medicare prescription drugs:
Note to Ops: Cognitive impairment can strike anywhere, at any time. If your prescriptions are too expensive, try this over-the-counter remedy:
Did you know Prevagen is made from jellyfish?

Saturday, October 30, 2021

Those Who Cannot Remember the Past are Condemned to Repeat It

Can I put you down for a yardsign?
A Halloween treat goes to the first person who can name this Illinois GOP Congressman who gained notoriety for opposing Donald Trump. You would be as likely to see him on TV as in his Congressional office. His far-rightwing Congressional career ended because of redistricting. And he is now widely expected to run for President in 2024.

The answer, of course, is Lake County favorite son Ex-Congressman Joe Walsh:
Joe Walsh raises 'White Flag' with new podcast
In related news, some unknown downstate Congressman says he will not run for re-election:
The time to move on 'is now': Adam Kinzinger won't run again for Congress in 2022
The Halloween contest winner may claim their Snickers.

Thursday, October 28, 2021

Bald Faced

Being that time of the year when the nation gathers to remember the dead, the Lake County GOP is celebrating Halloween:
Note to Ops: You are welcome to attend but your Halloween mask is not:
Now that's scary!

Saturday, October 23, 2021

The Fantasy Press

An actual unretouched screencap from the Lake County Gazette, Lake County's #1 fake news source:
"No new teachers in Deerfield sign pledge on Oct. 10 to teach Critical Race Theory"
In related news, no new Lake County Gazette editorial staff members have started beating their wives.

On October 10.

Your LakeCountyEye will keep you apprised when further developments warrant.

Tuesday, October 19, 2021

Park Your Drachmas in a Harvard Barn

Oh Noes Moto
Anyone who has ever seen the McHenryCountyBlog will not be surprised -- but the Russian Mafia has bought McHenry County.

A shell corporation called Optima bought the defunct Harvard Mororola plant in western McHenry County. Big surprise, the US Government now says the plant was not bought to crank out iPhones:
the DOJ complaint notes that the Harvard plant purchase was part of the sprawling Optima money laundering scheme (including fraudulent loans used to purchase the plant in the first place).
A Ukrainian Oligarch Bought a Midwestern Factory and Let it Rot. What Was Really Going On?
U.S. prosecutors say the decaying plant was part of a broader scheme to hide millions in stolen dollars across the American Midwest.
Don't plan on moving to Harvard to find work at the plant, it will have to be demolished by the Village ...
the net cost for that, after salvage, is probably three to five times the city's annual budget. It will be a financial catastrophe.
A Ukrainian Oligarch Bought a Midwestern Factory and Let it Rot. What Was Really Going On?
Note to Ops: If life gives you turnips, make borscht. Don't tear down that plant. Convert it into a Halloween Haunted House. Dress up the actors to look like Vladimir Putin. Now that's scary!

Saturday, October 16, 2021

Kash in the Barrel

And Justice for All
What a difference a day makes. The last time Lake County favorite son Kash Jackson appeared in this blog, he was an Illinois gubernatorial candidate:
Wither Winderweedle
Now he is under arrest for threatening to kill two Lake County judges:
A man who ran for Illinois governor in 2018 was taken into custody Thursday and accused of threatening to kill two Lake County judges, authorities said. Grayson K. Jackson, who also is known as Kash Jackson and Benjamin Winderweedle, 43, of Paris, Arkansas, made the threats Oct. 7, according to Lake County Sheriff’s
Former Libertarian gubernatorial candidate charged with threatening two Lake County judges
One legal scholar told your LakeCountyEye: "Well, that's an unconventional way to clear the courts."

In related news, Lake County favorite son Mark Curran is a candidate for the Illinois Supreme Court.

Thursday, October 14, 2021

A Friend in Need is a Friend in High Places

How many times has this happened to you? You receive a total of $15,000 in donations from a wealthy family.

Never?

Well then your name isn't Ex-Barrington Hills Mayor Martin McLaughlin.

As readers of this blog are aware ...
The Friends in High Places Zone
over the past 5 years, members of the Sanfilippo family donated $15,000 to Martin McLaughlin.

And now McLaughlin is holding a fundraiser at the Sanfillipo Residence in Barrington Hills. Coincidence? Your LakeCountyEye does not think so:
Note to Ops: Politics is about raising dough.  This is the recipe for success:
  • Solicit funds from a wealthy donor.
  • Use those funds to hire that donor to host a fundraiser for you.
  • Solicit funds from the wealthy donor.
  • Repeat as often as needed.
  • Any excess money raised is pure gravy!

Saturday, October 9, 2021

The Friends in High Places Zone

Barrington Hills Ex-Mayor Martin McLaughlin may be gone but he is not forgotten.

The Village of Barrington Hills Zoning Board of Appeals held a special meeting last month. Its one agenda item was to grant a Special Use Application (Non-Commercial Event Facility) to the Sanfilippo Estate:
Barrington Hills - Zoning Board of Appeals - Special Meeting
The Sanfilippo Estate is located on the sort of 25MPH country lane where no one expects to see a theme park.  A Special Use Application would grant the Sanfilippo family a zoning variance on uses of their estate:

Barrington Hills - Zoning Board of Appeals - Special Meeting
For the Record, during the past 5 years, Sanfilippos have donated a total of $15,000 to Martin McLaughlin:
Note to Ops: It's good to be the Ex-Mayor.

Tuesday, October 5, 2021

Is this Seat Taken?

6 down, 3 to go
Despite having been reported once already on this blog ...
Supreme Being
Lake County favorite son Mark Curran is running for Illinois Supreme Court justice:
Competition for the open Illinois Supreme Court District 2 seat grew, and a Republican primary is assured, as former Lake County Sheriff Mark Curran became the fifth candidate in the race.
Former Lake County Sheriff Mark Curran becomes fifth candidate in state Supreme Court race
By all indications a proponent of tough clean-air regulations, Curran was critical of Lake County's Republican smoke filled rooms:
Traditionally, Curran said, Lake County Republican leaders picked candidates for office in a "smoke filled room" telling party members who they should like.
Former Lake County Sheriff Mark Curran becomes fifth candidate in state Supreme Court race
For the record, some Lake County municipalities may deem a smoke filled room a community asset:
Suburbs' first cannabis lounge gets the thumbs-up to open in Mundelein
Will Mark Curran be on the High Court? Most excellent!

Friday, October 1, 2021

Boatloads of Cash

Your wouldn't know it from looking at their names, but the Village of Third Lake has two cash cows:
Druce Lake & Third Lake
The Village charges a fee to anyone who docks a boat on either of these lakes.

These revenues however may not be paying the bills. The Village of Third Lake is investigating ways to charge non-residents with the fees -- and is researching how other Villages do it:
One Village to the South -- the City of Chicago -- charges boats by the foot:


Note to Ops: Kerching!

Monday, September 27, 2021

The Lake County Republican Fomentation

Who is Carol Davis? Your LakeCountyEye found out so you don't have to.

Carol Davis is an anti-vaxxer ...
Carol Davis is an exorcist ...
Carol Davis is an authority on sugary & caffeinated beverages ...
Last but not least, Carol Davis was the featured speaker at the Lake County Republican Federation:
Stay classy, Lake County Republican Federation.

Sunday, September 26, 2021

Porcey's Revenge

An actual unretouched screencap from the all-thumbs theocrats at the McHenryCountyBlog:
Updating the FOID Approval Porcess Incompetence
In response to your LakeCountyEye's provocation, a spokesman issued a statement: "It's not like that happened on porpoise."

Thursday, September 23, 2021

Politics and Strange Bedfellows

Who is Carol Davis and why is she pilfering your LakeCountyEye?

On Aug 15 2021, your LakeCountyEye said this about the Lake County Republican Federation:
A lie will circle the globe before the truth can get its shoes on.
Lies, Damned Lies and the Big Lie
On Sep 7 2021, Carol Davis Tweeted:
Then a week later on Sep 18 2021, Carol Davis was the featured speaker at the Lake County Republican Federation:
Coincidence? Your LakeCountyEye does not think so.

Note to Ops: Mark Twain did not say ...
before the truth gets it’s [sic] PANTS on
The correct quote is ...
before the truth can get its SHOES on
That should be a big difference to the abstinence-only Party.

Monday, September 20, 2021

Is That Some Kind of Record?

Good records may be the foundation of any organization -- but who likes keeping good records? Not your LakeCountyEye. If you are in municipal government, this life hack from the Village of Old Mill Creek is for you:

Simply toss all of that paper into a banker's box:

Report by Attorney Krone on public records retention and internal search of 36 banker boxes
Village of Old Mill Creek -- Board of Trustees -- Regular Meeting -- Aug 9 2021

Sure, records may get lost but someone else can look for them:

President Smith: we will need to re-organize the effort to correct the missing records problem
Village of Old Mill Creek -- Board of Trustees -- Regular Meeting -- Aug 9 2021

And don't worry about the guy from the Illinois Secretary of State's office:


Next Week: A clever trick to deal with those annoying FOIA requests.

Saturday, September 18, 2021

Unclear on the Concept

Dan McConchie, no friend to labor, may be experiencing the effects of the labor shortage firsthand.

A employee on entrenched incumbent Dan McConchie's State Senate staff recently was cited on the Internet:
Whitney Barnes, a spokeswoman for Sen. Dan McConchie, R-Hawthorn Woods, believed: "Offering economical chance for all Illinoisans, specially those with confronted systematic barriers and deficiencies in investments, try a top-notch concern of Senate Republican person Dan McConchie. She's working to learn more about the requirements of all towns in Illinois and will eventually keep working with all of people in the Senate helping inspire economical development in each region within this county."
Pritzker signal expense to cap payday-loan rates of interest, resist racism linked to economic science
When contacted directly, a spokesman said: "Senator McConchie approves this message."

Thursday, September 16, 2021

Potpourri

where bowers and flowers bloom in the sun
Marijuana advocates, throughout Lake County, are giving themselves high fives:
Open burning of leaves allowed in unincorporated Lake County
Is the Marijuana industry in Lake County on a roll? Conjointly, there is good news from Mundelein:
Could suburbs' first cannabis lounge open in Mundelein?
Your LakeCountyEye asked a local head honcho: "Could the suburbs' first cannabis lounge open in Mundelein?"

He said: "Can I be blunt?  You don't go to the Vatican to sell condoms.  You go to a rock festival."

By the same token, that cannabis lounge may already be in the pipeline:
Suburbs' first cannabis lounge gets the thumbs-up to open in Mundelein
The local head honcho said: "Is the Pope Catholic?"

Saturday, September 11, 2021

911 Omission

Today is the 20th anniversary of the 911 attacks. Please mark this as a day of reflection and remembrance for those whose lives were irrevocably changed 20 years ago.

HaHa, j/k.

Please instead join entrenched incumbent State Senator Dan McConchie for a SHRIMP BOIL:

FUN FOR THE WHOLE FAMILY!

50/50 RAFFLE

GAMES

LIVE MUSIC

Note to Ops: Never forget your wallet.

Friday, September 10, 2021

Won't Somebody Think of the Children?

The Lake County Very Silly Party is spreading a broadsheet ...
They want to cancel Halloween!

Their demands are stark and transparent ...

"NO FORCED MASKS"

"If you are an adult living in fear of children who don't cover their faces it sounds like you could use some psych help. It's not children's job to suffocate themselves to make you feel safe. If you're that scared, STAY HOME and keep your fears off of everyone else's children."

You bet, your LakeCountyEye is scared. Scared that Halloween will be totally ruined if the kids are not allowed to wear their masks.

OK, your LakeCountyEye understands that some people may harbor some religious or psychological animus toward Halloween. If so then on October 31, simply decline to participate. Why spoil the fun for every kid?