Tuesday, December 29, 2009

Gaysaying

If Internet Powerhouse® Andy Martin makes a habit of outing his political opponents he runs a risk of becoming known as Internet Outhouse® Andy Martin. The Illinois Republican Senate candidate is airing radio ads that drop the G-bomb on his Senate opponent Mark Kirk. The ads, which have played on WBBM/780 ...
Political Ad Questions Republican's Sexual Orientation

Transcript from the Political Ad
call attention to long standing rumors that Mark Kirk is gay. The NewsSun reported the story as news ...
Gay attack ad targets Kirk's Senate run
The Daily Herald ...
GOP slams ad questioning Kirk's sexual orientation
noticed the story as well.

Your LakeCountyEye assumes the goal of the ad is to make it so there is one less elephant in the room. With a primary election a short five weeks away, Martin's radio spot is an 11th hour attempt to buttress his campaign -- one that would now be perceived as going down if it had ever gotten up in the first place.

Full disclosure: Andy Martin, the GOP's gift to Internet satire, has bagged the coveted LakeCountyEye Senate endorsement.
My Favorite Martin
No question, Martin's ad is a cheap shot. Whether or not the rumors are true, your LakeCountyEye will not speculate. Kirk is deserving of an even break, particularly during the holidays.

So, in an effort to clear the air and to be fair & balanced, your LakeCountyEye has compiled 10 people, places and things that are much more gay than Mark Kirk:

  1. Tom Cruise

  2. Boughs of Holly

  3. A French Horn

  4. Voting for Cap and Trade

  5. A Roll of Two Dollar Bills

  6. Aaron Schock (R/IL-18)

  7. Tangelo (citrus fruit)

  8. Tangelo (given name)

  9. Submarine Duty

  10. Alexi Giannoulias

Your LakeCountyEye needs to don some gay apparel. Today is the day your LakeCountyEye starts the new gig selling shoes at Abercrombie & Fitch.

3 comments:

IllinoisJim said...

Sir, I may be missing something here, but you guys are endorsing this jerk? Oh, wait; it is an “internet endorsement”. Sort of like LOL, another term I don’t get. I lived in Lincoln Park in the 70’s. After Mayor Daley’s death and Mr Belandic’s snowstorm, an “Anthony Robert Martin-Trigona” for mayor broadcast political ads every hour during the March 1979 primary campaign. Jane Byrne won. Mr. Trigona would hold rallies where reporters outnumbered supporters. Then, he disappeared. This is the same guy? Mr. Trigona Martin’s hateful, tawdry, ginned up, inhumane behavior and attacks are embarrassing. Illinois scandals have always shown an above the belt, humane, lack of ethics, like Mr. Ryan’s and Mr. Blagojevich’s flirtation with money, power, & prison. Nothing like this. And where does he get his $$?

Anonymous said...

Dear Illinois Jim:

Anthony Robert Martin-Trigonas is Andy Martin. Or shall I say Andy Martin is Anthony Robert Martin-Trigonas. Or shall I say Anthony R. Martin-Trigonas is Andy Martin. Or Andy R. Martin is Anthony Martin-Trigonas. Or . . .

What really confuses me is the IL GOP stating that someone named Andrew Martin is no longer considered a Republican. Well, who is Andrew Martin? Is that Anthony Martin? Anthony R. Martin? Anthony Robert Martin? Anthony Martin-Trigonas? Anthony R. Martin-Trigonas? Anthony Robert Martin-Trigonas?

The mind reels!

Nevermind. I'm getting a headache now.

Barney Baxter said...

Hi IllinoisJim,
Martin remains the GOP's leading gift to Internet satire. Considering the field, no small feat.
-BB-