Secret Organization

He may be yesterday's news, but the facts have not changed: Mark Robinson (the self-described black Nazi perv) had been invited to speak in Lake County by the Tenth Congressional District Republican Organization:

Controversial North Carolina Lt. Gov. Mark Robinson has pulled the plug on a much-criticized speaking appearance at a GOP fundraiser, according to the Tenth Congressional District Republican Organization's website.
Robinson won't speak at local GOP event amid latest firestorm

And yet one disturbing question remains, still unanswered:

What could possibly be the Tenth Congressional District Republican Organization?

Does anyone know? To find out, your LakeCountyEye asked the man-in-the-street:

"It's like one of those things you read about in The Onion."

Sally Kavity, Unemployed Suburban Mom

"Obviously not a scam PAC."

Shaw Marx, Malingerer

"Parlez-vous français?"

Brian Keith, Haitian Immigrant

 

They're unanimous -- nobody knows what the Tenth Congressional District Republican Organization is.

Vox populi, vox Dei.

Next of Quinn

When Martin McLaughlin uses the words career politician he means them as an insult. This from McLaughlin's website ...

Who is Martin McLaughlin? McLaughlin is ... wait for it ... another career politician. This from McLaughlin's Wikipedia page:

Martin McLaughlin (politician)

Note to Ops: Someone who's been in politics as long as Martin McLaughlin is going to know all the tricks of the trade.

Office Copy

Note to Ops: Have you been moping and are all like ...

"It's late September and I really should be back at school my LakeCountyEye MasterClass™"?

If you have, well brood no longer. In this semester of the LakeCountyEye MasterClass™ you will learn how to draw in the style of the Chicago Tribune Creepy Cartoonist™:

Go to the IMDb and download a still from the classic motion picture The Apartment:

Put some tracing paper over the image:

Trace the outline of a few desks, then add Jack Lemmon:

But Who's Counting?

And voila, anybody, even you, can be a political cartoonist!

Where have you gone, Mr Robinson?

Did you hear the one about the exhibitionist who was a no-show at the local GOP fundraiser? HaHa, hang up your raincoats, the GOP black Nazi perv guy will not be coming to Lake County:

Controversial North Carolina Lt. Gov. Mark Robinson has pulled the plug on a much-criticized speaking appearance at a GOP fundraiser, according to the Tenth Congressional District Republican Organization's website.
Amid pushback, controversial nominee for NC governor Mark Robinson cancels appearance at North Shore GOP fundraiser

Tickets however for the fundraiser are still available, either stag or with a date:

It is not known if that is cash-only.

What's that you say, Mr Robinson?

Note to Ops: Pop open the lubricant. Here is your chance to rub elbows with the black Nazi guy:

Who is the black Nazi guy? He is also known as the slavery is good guy. Or as the Nude Africa guy. Or as the I just wanna see the sex tape guy.

Whoever he is, he will be headlining a fundraiser for some local GOP organizations. If you attend, don't neglect to pay some respect to your host, Mark Shaw Who is also known as the couldn't happen to a nicer guy.

Pipe Down

A man with a banana in his ear walked into the Mundelein outdoor cannabis festival. Someone said "Excuse me, do you know there is a banana in your ear?" The man replied "What did you say?" Someone else said "Why is a banana in your ear?" The man replied "What?" Someone else said "There is a banana in your ear!" The man replied "I'm sorry, I can't hear you. The music is too loud."

HaHa, true story. Loud music from the Mundelein cannabis festival has resulted in complaints being lodged at city-hall:

The people who spoke about the concert during the public comment section of Monday's board meeting live in the Lakewood Village neighborhood near the dispensary. They primarily complained about noise, saying it went on late into the night.
Mundelein residents complain about concert at dispensary

To be sure, any open-air marijuana fest is going to make a stink with some neighbors. But when that stink is over the live music, then you have a problem. One showbiz insider suggests hiring (Lake County favorite son) Ted Nugent next year: "Sure, Ted Nugent is going to play loud, but nobody listens to him any more."

Run and Take the Money

Note to Ops, dust off your alms chests:

The nearly $72 million a Lake Forest billionaire and his wife have contributed to federal candidates and groups this election cycle is significantly greater than any other Illinoisans' donations, data from an independent research group shows. The total makes Republican benefactors Richard and Elizabeth Uihlein the nation's third-most prolific campaign donors
Who are the top federal campaign donors from Illinois?

Lake County moneybags Richard Uihlein has given $72,000,000 to Federal candidates. How much of that money will be spent in Lake County? None. That's because Lake County does not have any Federal Candidates. Well, no GOP Federal candidates to speak of.

$72 million (a ton of dough by anyone's estimation) would make for a nice down payment on someone's dream. In Lake County, ten of them at the very least:

10 Things $72,000,000 Will Get You in Lake County

86-ft doobie at the Mundelein cannabis fest. Hire a troll to guard the Long Grove bridge. Add a passing lane to the new Waukegan Airport runway. 1,440,000,000 nickel slot pulls at the Waukegan Casino. Two Words: Pickleball Palooza Binge-buy your way thru the ULINE catalog. Build that big border wall down Lake-Cook Rd. Bet it all on bitcoin. Some health insurance for your backyard chickens. Turn Lake County red.

Look for your LakeCountyEye at an ATM machine near you.

Bonfire & Brews

Bonfire & Brews: A Taste of Gurnee

Where's Waldo?

What is wrong with this picture?

Sharpeyed operatives will recognize a Lake County Gazette story. And they will recognize the picture of Martin McLaughlin. Except the picture is not Martin McLaughlin. No, that is a picture of a Peoria Park District Trustee. As in Peoria County, Illinois.

WTH? Everyone knows that the Lake County Gazette is Lake County's #1 fakenews source, where its stories are randomly generated by news-bots. And everyone knows that these random stories come illustrated with a picture of Lake County backbench state rep Martin McLaughlin. (Why? Because Lake County Gazette.)

This particular story is about who practices law in Lake County. While the guy in the picture, for all your Lake County Eye knows, has never been in Lake County.

A media spokesman for the media said: "OK, that's not Martin McLaughlin. But it is a picture of some middle-aged white guy. Who's going to know the difference?"

It's Gonna Be YUGE

The Creepy Chicago Tribune Cartoonist™ drew a cartoon about the Federal deficit. Naturally enough, for a symbol he chose a species of African mega-fauna:

I Got Next

Both the black rhinoceros and the white rhinoceros are critically endangered species. Their numbers are shrinking, with fewer than 20,000 to be found in the wild. Using a rhinoceros to symbolize an expanding Federal deficit would just seem to be lazy cartooning. But then again, the Creepy Chicago Tribune Cartoonist™.

A better symbol would be Donald J Trump -- the largest Ex-President since William Howard Taft. Trump weighs in at a whopping 322 pounds, which has been steadily increasing since his inauguration in 2017:

Just Sayin!

A Keen Grasp of the Obvious

An actual unretouched screen capture from the Lake County Gazette, Lake County's #1 fakenews source:

One thing should be crystal clear, the Lake County Gazette is reporting that Lake County did not fund their women's collegiate football teams in 2023.

In related news, Lake County doesn't have any women's collegiate football teams.

In other related news, Generalissimo Francisco Franco is still dead.

Cartoon Violence

Overheard at a meeting of the Vernon Township Republicans: "See you in the funny papers."

All kidding aside, people who read the comics section of the Vernon Township GOP newsletter are not laughing:

The two-panel cartoon, which the group published this month in an electronic newsletter, depicts a visibly injured woman wearing a "Vote Blue" T-shirt telling an anthropomorphic donkey with tattoos reading "war," "open border" "crime" and more that she won't leave him "as long as I can have abortions." Officials from both parties blasted the cartoon and the group for publishing it.
'A lapse in judgment': Cartoon in GOP newsletter bashed by suburban Democrats and Republicans

Naturally enough, doing what Donald Trump would do, the Vernon Township Republicans doubled down on their toxic cartoon. HaHa, j/k:

Vernon Township Republican organization officials on Wednesday called their publication of a much-criticized political cartoon that made light of domestic violence "a lapse in judgment."
'A lapse in judgment': Cartoon in GOP newsletter bashed by suburban Democrats and Republicans

Note to Ops: Don't let cancel culture harsh your mellow. Look for the bleeped cartoon at your next GOP barbecue and gun raffle ...

If the toon fits, wear it!

Tax Racket

Have you been tricked by a property tax scam? If so, your payment is due. The Lake County Gazette says a fraudulent tax bill may arrive in your mailbox:

Sharpeyed operatives will recognize the picture of backbench state rep Martin McLaughlin. And while it is unlikely that McLaughlin is involved in a property tax scan, either as a victim or a perpetrator, nothing is known for certain -- because Martin McLaughlin is actually mentioned nowhere in the Lake County Gazette story.

A spokesman of unimpeccable provenance said: "No one reads the Lake County Gazette anyways. We could have used a picture of Foghorn Leghorn and no one would have known any difference. Plus, we can use McLaughlin's photo for free."

Gurnee Days 2024

Gurnee Days 2024

You Say Kamala, I Say Kamala

It looks like Joe Walsh won't be ordering the white cheddar cheeseburger up to a suite in the Trump Tower Chicago any time soon. Lake County GOP favorite son Joe Walsh is a Republican for Harris:

Prominent Illinois Republicans throw support behind Kamala Harris

In related news, the new chair to the Illinois Republican Party is Lake County GOP favorite son Kathy Salvi.

Note to Ops: Don't expect to see Walsh at the next Lake County GOP unity brunch & gun raffle.

National Poll Worker Recruitment Day

National Poll Worker Recruitment Day

Creative License

Are you suffering from memory loss, poor coordination, attention deficiency? Well, the Illinois Department of Financial and Professional Regulation has your back. Hey, all you cannabis dispensary owners, it's high time you got around to renewing your licenses. The details are in the Lake County Gazette:

Sharpeyed operatives will recognize the picture of backbench Lake County State Rep Martin McLaughlin. McLaughlin is not mentioned anywhere in the Lake County Gazette story. And while he most likely does not have a license to sell cannabis, Martin McLaughlin does have the look of a Donald Trump Vice Presidential running mate -- aka a license to steal. A license to steal the hearts of all the childless cat ladies!

Chicago Tribute Band

Sounds of Summer – Chicago Tribute Band

The Rich are Different from You and Me

Dust off your slide rules, today's pop quiz will test your math skills.

Q: A billion here and a billion there and pretty soon you're talking what?

A: Two billion.

HaHa, honorary Lake County Republican and US Rep Darin LaHood said this somewhere, to someone:

"If Governor Pritzker didn't have a billion dollars, he wouldn't be in office right now."
Illinois GOP delegation confident of Trump win

He was then asked: If Donald Trump didn't have a billion dollars, would he be running for office right now? Then someone, somewhere else said: "You're pushing a false equivalency. That grifter Trump doesn't have even two nickels to call his own."

The Jabberwocky in Milwaukee

That giant sucking sound you heard came from all of the Lake County Trump delegates going north over border. The GOP national convention this year is in Milwaukee, that horrible city^®.

Lake County GOP favorite son Mark Shaw said:

"as (former President) Ronald Reagan asked, we'll say, 'Are you better off than you were four years ago?'"
Lake County delegates looking forward to again nominating Trump at GOP convention

Then Lake County GOP favorite son Craig Wilcox said:

"Most people know they were in a much better place 3½ years ago than they are today."
Lake County delegates looking forward to again nominating Trump at GOP convention

In related news: Are you experiencing brain-fog? That may be a symptom of Long COVID. Those who cannot remember the past are condemned to repeat old predictable slogans.

More Guns

When is the next Lake County gun raffle? August 8, which is just around the corner:

"Do your part to help preserve your Second Amendment Rights."

Taylor Dance Party

Sounds of Summer – Taylor Dance Party

Trouble Tickets

The Lake County Gazette says to read the fine print on your concert tickets, they could be fakes:

The press release is from IL Attorney General Kwame Raoul, and ordinarily that's his photo beneath the headline. However, sharpeyed operatives may actually recognize backbench State Representative Martin McLaughlin.

What gives? Is Martin McLaughlin a ticket scalper? If so, he is not wearing his trenchcoat in the picture. With ticket stubs pinned to the lining. In fact there is no mention of McLaughlin in the article. Or anyone named Martin, for that matter.

No, it is quite likely that Martin McLaughlin has never scalped a ticket in his life. More likely the Lake County Gazette (Lake County's #1 gift to comedy) has sold you another bill of goods.

The Bombs Bursting in Air

Question of the day:  In Canada, when is the Fourth of July?

Answer: The First of July.

Lake County will not be watching any fireworks on Canadian Independence Day. The Canadian National exploding bomb train derailed in Matteson:

A train derailed in at an Illinois village on Thursday, promoting an investigation and temporary evacuations in the area. According to local news, the incident happened in Matteson, about 30 miles from Chicago, and involved a train from the Canadian National Railway Company.
Train derails at Illinois village; resident evacuation lifted

One self-described industry watchdog said: "The bomb trains should be operating again by the Fourth. Bring the kiddos!"

Joint Return

Note to bounty hunters: Now that marijuana is legal, you should have guessed that Chief Keef would be back in Illinois:

Thousands gathered this year for the Lyrical Lemonade Summer Smash Festival at SeatGeek Stadium in Bridgeview, just outside of Chicago. Every year this festival brings to town some of the hottest talent in hip-hop. But this year was special for the hometown crowd as the legendary, mythical Chicago artist Chief Keef was slated to headline the final night of the festival. Chief Keef has essentially been living in exile from his hometown for the past twelve years, due to a mixture of legal issues and a general fear that his presence may result in violence.
The Show Must Go On
Chief Keef performs in Chicagoland for the first time in twelve years despite severe weather.

For the record, Chief Keef is a supporter of Donald Trump:

13 Rappers Who Are Still Supporting Donald Trump

Mr Keef has not been the only Lake County GOP favorite son spotted this month. Lake County GOP favorite son Louis Atsaves was seen at the Illinois Republican Party Convention in Collinsville:

Bring Me the Head of ...

Coming up tomorrow: Who was spotted at Lake County GOP potluck picnic & gun raffle? Yet another Lake County GOP favorite son, Ted Nugent. Nugent shared the trophy for the three-legged race.

Sounds of Summer – Radio Gaga

Sounds of Summer – Radio Gaga

The Brink of Disaster

Good news! Your LakeCountyEye has just been appointed to be a delegate at the Illinois Republican Party Convention. WooHoo, this means an all expenses paid free vacation in sunny Collinsville. Illinois. (Fun fact, Collinsville is a suburb of sunny St Louis. Missouri.)

Details are here ...

Keith Brin Letter to IL GOP County Chairs June 10 2024

Note to Ops: When you receive your copy of the letter, you must absolutely make sure to forward a copy immediately to the name on the top of the list. If you break the chain, then no one will be named a delegate to Illinois Republican Party Convention.

Bring Me the Head of ...

Question of the Day: Who is the Chairman of the Lake County Republican Party?

Answer: Nobody knows.

But everybody knows Mark Shaw, the the former Lake County GOP Chairman. Along with being on the Trump campaign payroll, Shaw is the Vice Chairman of the Illinois State Republican Party. Shaw is no longer the Vice Chairman of the Illinois State Republican Party:

Illinois Republican Leaders Oust Vice Chair Mark Shaw Over 'Trans Delegate' Scandal

Seizing the inevitable, Mark Shaw published a 10-page airing of grievances in his defense:

MARK L. SHAW RESPONDS

Spoiler alert, LakeCountyEye favorite son Louis Atsaves makes a cameo appearance on page 3.

Playing All the Anglers

There is an old saying in Lake County: Give a man a fish, and you feed him for a day. Teach a man to fish, and he's going to want to buy a new boat.

The Lake County Gazette (Lake County's #1 fakenews source) says there is free fishing in Lake County over the holiday weekend:

Sharpeyed operatives will recognize the photo of backbench State Rep Martin McLaughlin. If McLaughlin is an angler, he is not wearing his hip waders in the picture. Or for that matter, his fishing hat with lures attached to the brim. In fact there is no mention of McLaughlin in the article. Or anyone named Martin, for that matter.

But if you GOOGLE the Lake County Gazette for Free Fishing, you will get a picture of backbench State Rep Martin McLaughlin anyways.

HaHa. You been catfished!

Water Pipes

Note to Ops: Satire is like clean drinking water. Not everybody gets it.

Everyone in Lake County will be getting it, with some help from the Environmental Protection Agency:

Waukegan and North Chicago both plan to take advantage of more than $240 million the U.S. Environmental Protection Agency (EPA) gave to the Illinois EPA (IEPA) in May for lead pipe replacement as part of President Joe Biden's Investing in America agenda.
Lake Co. cities seeking funds for pipe replacement

A spokesman for the Mundelein cannabis festival said: "The federal government wants to give us new pipes? Most excellent!"

When it was pointed out that the money was for lead pipes, the spokesman said: "So, what's your point?"

Where's a Farmer When You Need One?

That feeling of deja vu that you have may not be some recurring condition. That's because, once again, backbench State Rep Martin McLaughlin showed up on the Lake County Gazette:

The article with McLaughlin's picture relays a USDA report about farming conditions in Illinois. If McLaughlin is a farmer, he is not wearing his bib overalls. Or his John Deere hat. Or a piece of straw dangling between his teeth. In fact there is no mention of McLaughlin in the article. Or anyone named Martin, for that matter.

But if you GOOGLE the Lake County Gazette for positive USDA forecast, you will get a picture of backbench State Rep Martin McLaughlin.

HaHa. Psych!

Urban Bestrewal

Question of the day: What did the satirist say to the Village of Fox River Grove?

Answer: "It's easier to tear down than build up."

There is a towering hole along historic Rte 14, now, where there once had been a city block:

As a block of buildings in downtown Fox River Grove are demolished into a grassy lot, village officials are in talks with multiple developers to create a new downtown.
Demolition of downtown Fox River Grove block nears completion
Village has several developers interested in the vacant land, officials say

So, what's on tap to sprout up from the smoldering ashes? Nobody knows:

The village is currently in talks with "several developers," but no agreements have been made, yet
Demolition of downtown Fox River Grove block nears completion
Village has several developers interested in the vacant land, officials say

One spokesman for somebody in particular said: "We can always turn the property into a golf course. With a hole that big on the first tee, every golfer is guaranteed to break par."

Where's a Cop When You Need One?

Backbench State Rep Martin McLaughlin showed up on the Lake County Gazette:

The article with McLaughlin's picture is about some police officers who were given the Law Enforcement Medal of Honor. If McLaughlin is a police officer, he is not wearing his uniform in the picture.

In fact there is no mention of McLaughlin in the article. Or anyone named Martin, for that matter.

But if you GOOGLE the Lake County Gazette for Law Enforcement Medal of Honor, you will get a picture of backbench State Rep Martin McLaughlin.

HaHa Bazinga!

All Politics is Loco

Like many other college towns, Lake Forest is the site of a college: Lake Forest College.

Along with its own college, Lake Forest has its own unique form of government, the Lake Forest Caucus:

2023 ...

Selection of Lake Forest's next mayor thrown into turmoil after caucus nomination rejected

Editorial: Lake Forest caucus runs up against messy democracy. Now a fascinating mayoral election ensues.

Lake Bluff, Lake Forest, Winnetka and Glencoe defend their caucus systems

Proposed Lake Forest Caucus bylaw change seen as protection against 'manipulation,' or return to 'smoke-filled rooms of the past'

Lake Forest Caucus general membership rejects controversial bylaw change; 'I think it (would) make the process more secret'

Lake Forest Caucus elects new officers amid criticisms of the process; 'They are just ramming this down our throats'

2024 ...

Future of Lake Forest Caucus unclear after officer-slate rejection; 'We are looking for some changes … that reflect all the voices in Lake Forest'

Lake Forest Caucus leaders stick with rejected officer slate; 'These were the cards we were dealt'

Lake Forest Caucus plans another vote for officers; 'We do not want divisive litigation in the community'

Lake Forest Caucus sets second election for controversial proposed officer slate

A recent poll of leading political scientists in Illinois is unanimous: No one knows what the Lake Forest Caucus is for. Or for that matter, what it is.

Up in Arms

There is a proven theorem in combinatorics that says your odds are better for winning the lottery if you do not play the lottery than if you do. Your luck may be better yet instead, if you drop your gamblin'money at the Waukegan Casino:

American Place casino owner Full House Resorts produced record earnings in the first quarter of the year led by the performance of The Temporary at American Place in Waukegan.
Waukegan casino's owner reports record earnings: 'We look forward to continued growth at American Place'

And when you go, send regards to one Waukegan Alderman who will be working the one-armed bandits:

Waukegan's mayor is criticizing an alderman for posting online a photo of a severed arm found this month on the city's lakefront
Waukegan mayor calls alderman’s posting of severed-arm photo 'morally disgusting'

That's all your LakeCountyEye has. Get rolling.

GO Gurnee Re-Boot: Get Moving in May

GO Gurnee Re-Boot: Get Moving in May

Dox Redux

Postpone your plans for the technological singularity. The AI Revolution is on the fritz.

The web-bots employed by the Lake County Gazette to reveal Lake County voter information, have been omitting the voter's street numbers and birth months and days:

In other news, a judge gave the Lake County Gazette (Lake County's #1 fakenews source) until Monday May 13 to remove the voter information.

Judge orders 'pink slime' publications to remove voters' personal information

Note to Ops: The Internet is Forever.

If it Looks Like a Dox ...

Note to Ops: If you want to look up the address, birth year and voting record of Lake County Associate Circuit Judge Daniel Jasica, you better hurry up. The Judge ordered the Lake County Gazette to remove all Lake County voter information that has been posted on its website:

A Lake County judge has given the company that publishes far-right websites and flyers designed to look like newspapers until 5 p.m. Monday to remove some personally identifiable voter information it publicly posted earlier this year in apparent violation of state law.
Judge orders 'pink slime' publications to remove voters' personal information

It is believed that this is the first time the Lake County Gazette (Lake County's #1 fakenews source) has been ordered to remove factual content from its website. That is because this is the first time the Lake County Gazette has ever posted factual content there.

The Church Invisible

Even a simple country political blog will have to acknowledge a religious confrontation over land ownership that has been dominating the news lately. Your LakeCountyEye, of course, refers to efforts by the Plymouth Brethren Christian Church to buy land from the South Barrington Park District.

Local interests had united to stop the sale of park district land to the religious organization:

The pending sale of land by the South Barrington Park District to a small, relatively unknown church group grew into a resident upheaval that included a lawsuit, but ended Wednesday with cancellation of the purchase, uncertainty about what's next and the resignation of a park board commissioner.
South Barrington park board votes to halt land sale to Plymouth Brethren Christian Church after clash with residents and being sued. A park commissioner quit amid the vitriol, citing 'nonsense.'

The tract of land is called AREA N. And while the "N" stands for NIMBY, the religious organization was recently able to obtain the land by operating under the guise of a shell company:

South Barrington Park District officials didn't learn a religious group was behind the winning bid for 34 acres of public parkland until two weeks after the $2.3 million sale was finalized, they revealed Tuesday. A limited liability company called Area N Development was the winning bidder for the land at Bartlett Road and Route 59, a wooded spot known to many as Area N, during a Feb. 28 auction. The park district closed the deal on March 7. Area N Development was created in Delaware about a week before the auction, public records show. It wasn't until March 22 that Schaumburg-based Fourth Avenue Gospel, which is owned and operated by members of the Plymouth Brethren Christian Church and was behind a failed effort to acquire the property in 2023, publicly admitted it invented Area N Development to buy the land.
Officials say they didn't know religious group was behind land buy until after it was completed

In other news, a spokesman for the Waukegan Airport said: "So, you can obtain public parkland without disclosing your true identity? Tell me more!"

Padded Envelope

Attention, shoppers: An envelope containing $20,000,000 has been found. The owner may claim it now. Please bring a photo ID:

The day after Darren Bailey won the 2022 Republican governor primary, he and his campaign manager made an urgent, unscheduled helicopter trip from downstate to meet political operative and right-wing radio show host Dan Proft for a closed-door meeting to talk about "serious" campaign funding. At a Chicago-area country club, Proft met both men at the front door and led them to a secluded room where he placed a white envelope on a table and said it contained $20 million from ultraconservative billionaire mega-donor Richard Uihlein.
At secret meeting, right-wing radio host Dan Proft dangled $20 million to Darren Bailey's governor run

All told, Lake County moneybags Richard Uhilein gave away more than $64,000,000 to alter the 2022 eletion.

In related news, ULINE has reported that orders for white envelopes have soared:

Note to Ops: Discounts are available on bulk purchases.

Must Disgust by Early May Orders from the DA

How many times has this happened to you? One of your good old boys, in a high elected office, says he is retiring. So you recruit a strong, sensible candidate for the office. Only to watch him lose in the Primary to a gung ho trumpster.

Whereupon, no surprise, the trumpster loses in the general election.

Well next time, don't work harder, work smarter. Get that office holder to run in the Primary, regardless, where he will be unopposed. It's only after he wins the Primary, that the office holder should announce his retirement. And then you caucus in a strong, sensible candidate for the office. SIKE!

In other news ...

Randi Freese announces run for McHenry County state’s attorney after Kenneally announces sudden withdrawal from race

McHenry County state’s attorney Patrick Kenneally announced his abrupt withdrawal from the ballot after winning the 2024 Republican Primary. Not long after that, assistant state’s attorney Randi Freese announced that with Kenneally's encouragement, she will be a candidate for his office.

The End.

No Cannabis Do

Your LakeCountyEye won't have Patrick Kenneally to kick around any more:

McHenry County State's Attorney Patrick Kenneally said Tuesday that, "after nonstop agonizing," he has chosen not to seek re-election in November. It would have been his third term as state's attorney, and he was running unopposed, having just won his Republican primary last month.
McHenry County State's Attorney Patrick Kenneally drops re-election bid, will step down as top prosecutor

Patrick Kenneally is currently the 2024 GOP candidate for McHenry County State's Attorney. He made his surprise announcement a few days after 4/20, International Cannabis Day. Party officials are expected to meet in a smoke filled room to nominate a replacement.

Your LakeCountyEye will keep you apprised when further developments warrant.

Stand-in Somebody Else's Shoe

No doubt about it, the writing was on the wall. The McHenry County man who shot himself in the foot now has established a farm team:

A Mundelein-area teen who initially claimed to be the victim of a drive-by shooting actually shot himself in the leg by accident, authorities said Sunday.
Sheriff: Reported drive-by shooting victim accidentally shot himself

A spokesman said: "Do you have the right stuff to be a McHenry County man who shot himself in the foot™? All you need are a firearm and an itchy trigger finger."

Farm team applicants are asked to attend the Mundelein outdoor cannabis festival. Where they will obtain valuable experience at misfiring their weapons.

Evaporated Milk

HL Mencken, the Sage of Baltimore, once said "nobody ever went bankrupt selling ice cream to the American people":

Oberweis Dairy filed for bankruptcy protection on Friday. The North Aurora-based company, known for its ice cream and milk packaged in glass bottles, filed a voluntary petition for Chapter 11 bankruptcy protections in the Northern District of Illinois, court records show.
Oberweis Dairy files for bankruptcy protection with more than $4M owed: court filings

The dairy belongs to the family of perennial Republican candidate Jim Oberweis. Oberweis, who inherited the family business, was on the ballot in Lake County for Governor, US Senate, US Congress, on numerous occasions. Oberweis campaigned on anti-immigration, anti-abortion, and other far-right issues. Oberweis is now the owner of a bankrupt business and is not to be confused with perennial candidate and business-owner Donald J Trump.

Note to Ops: April 15 is tax day. Declaring bankruptcy does not get you out of having to file your Federal taxes.

A Dox on Your House

This is dedicated to each Lake County voter who is experiencing an identity crisis. You know who you are.

The Lake County Gazette has published the names, addresses, birth dates of every Lake County registered voter:

Needless to say, that is enough information to steal your identity. The Illinois Attorney General is investigating:

The State Board of Elections has asked Attorney General Kwame Raoul to consider legal action against the publisher of far-right faux newspapers and websites for publishing personal information about Illinois voters.
State elections board asks AG’s office to look into publisher of fake newspapers for printing voter data

Being Lake County's #1 fakenews source, the Lake County Gazette deploys web bots to generate much of its content.

Note to Ops: There are many reputable services available that promise to monitor, alert, and assist in preventing or recovering from identity theft.

Identity theft

Just Sayin!

Heliophobia

Anyone driving down to see the eclipse might want to leave their Tesla in the garage. None of those solar charging stations will be of much use to you.

One solar facility in particular will be of no use to one Lake County community.  Hawthorn Woods residents successfully stopped a solar farm from going up in their backyards:

An application for a proposed commercial solar farm site along Fairfield Road in Hawthorn Woods has been withdrawn. The village's recent annexation of the property is being challenged in court.
Public hearing on proposed commercial solar facility near Hawthorn Woods canceled as village annexes property

When asked if the Waukegan Airport will annex the property, a spokesman said: "No. The last time we annexed a solar farm, the first electric jumbojet that went up ran out of batteries at 30,000 feet."

April is the Foolest Month

Breaking news: Reliable sources tell your LakeCountyEye that April Fool's Day has been moved forward to April 2, at least for the current year.

Who knew? Not your LakeCountyEye. Mark your calendars. It's not every day that your horometrical overlords fool around with April Fool's Day.

In related news, a truck did not crash into the Long Grove covered bridge. And the Waukegan Airport did not annex any public land. And no one was baked at the Mundelein cannabis festival.

The McHenry County Man who did not shoot himself in the foot was unavailable for comment.