Thursday, September 19, 2013

Moving the Goal Posts

Jubilation T Cornpone Operatives hoping for a re-match between crowd pleaser ex-Congressman Joe Walsh and Congresswoman Tammy Duckworth will be disappointed. Manju Goel, an Aurora businesswoman and native of India, may already be the Republican to bet on as to who will challenge Duckworth in the Eighth Congressional District. The Daily Herald reports that Goel, who attended the Northwest Suburban Republican Family Picnic ...
is backed by a national group of Republicans, including Texas congressman Pete Sessions, who accompanied Goel to Sunday's event. This will be Goel's first run for public office, according to the Illinois State Board of Elections website. Sunday's picnic also brought attention to the 8th district's growing Indian-American presence in local Republican circles. Goel was given a traditional Indian welcome by being showered with flower petals.
Goel announces 8th congressional candidacy
Sensing a trend, your LakeCountyEye contacted Dr. I.M. Bhatschidtkhrazzi, Professor of Surprising Political Trends at the College of Lake County. Your LakeCountyEye caught up with Dr. Bhatschidtkhrazzi in Chicago, at the campaign headquarters of Bill Daley for Governor.

"What you are seeing" said Dr. Bhatschidtkhrazzi "is part of a broader national trend. Whether deserved or not, the GOP has a reputation of being the party of angry white males. They want to counter that perception by promoting candidates in 2014 who are non-angry non-white and/or non-male."

Your LakeCountyEye was having none of that. The GOP gubernatorial candidates all have names like Bill Brady, Kirk Dillard, Bruce Rauner, Dan Rutherford.

"Absolutely, those names read like the B-Card at a WWE tournament." chuckled Dr. Bhatschidtkhrazzi. "But who did they pick for their Lieutenant Governors? Candidates with names like Maria Rodriguez, Jil Tracy, Steve Kim."

Well, your LakeCountyEye thought out loud, Lieutenant Governor ain't worth a bucket of warm fizz.

"That's precisely the point." rejoined Dr. Bhatschidtkhrazzi. "Nobody believes Tammy Duckworth is beatable in 2014.  So the GOP recruits a Manju Goel to get that name on the ballot.  You can tell if a Democratic Congressperson is vulnerable by whether of not their GOP opponent is an angry white male."

Your LakeCountyEye was sure Robert Dold appreciated the words of encouragement.

"The real negative outlier" continued Dr. Bhatschidtkhrazzi "is Joe Walsh, the macdaddy of angry white males. The dance card doesn't look good for poor Mr Walsh. He can run for Senate against Dick Durbin, where he will get clobbered. Or he can find another Republican Congressman to challenge in the Primary. It's rumored that Walsh is eyeing Adam Kinzinger's seat."

Your LakeCountyEye was now confused. Isn't Adam Kinzinger an angry white male?

"I don't think so." replied Dr. Bhatschidtkhrazzi. "People tell me that Kinzinger is a jaunty white male."

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