Friday, April 22, 2011

Earth Case Scenario

Today was Earth Day 2011 in Lake County, and the UN mandated holiday was observed in typical fashion here. Wetlands continue to be drained to clear a Shermanesque corridor for the Route 53 Extension. Lake Michigan continues to be drained to subsidize the water slide industry, west of Route 21. Angry mobs pull down more annoying wind turbines. A decommissioned Zion Nuclear Plant stews in its own juices. Creationists plot to replace Science with Religion in school curricula. And the Lake County Board contemplates erecting migrant worker shanty towns on Forest Preserve property, to goose the county population past the magic 800,000 number.

Of course Earth Day is not all fun and games. Now that global warming has passed the point of no return, and kicked-in full-bore, your LakeCountyEye is frankly pessimistic. After the environment collapses, what goes next? Economic collapse? Collapse of Democracy? Collapse of the social order? Something worse? Tough questions indeed. Your LakeCountyEye hopes the Governor signs that conceal-carry law before it's too late!

Of course protracted climate change doesn't have to be all gloom and doom. There are well-documented feedback mechanisms that drive global warming. For instance as the Earth temperature increases, polar ice melts. As the ice melts, less sunlight is reflected back into space. The Earth temperature increases some more. And repeat.

But Climatologists have identified opposing feedback mechanisms that actually work to cool down the planet. As temperatures increase, expect more drought, wildfire, monster hurricanes & tornadoes. Expect a rising percentage of people to be displaced from their trailer-park, rural and red-state homes. Decreasing numbers of office seekers, who had counted on these now displaced people for their votes, will be elected. And maybe government will finally take meaningful steps to counteract global warming.

So your LakeCountyEye sees a sliver of hope on this Earth Day 2011. Unless of course you happen to live in McHenry County.

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