Friday, December 31, 2010

Extraordinary Petition

With a new year ahead, LakeCountyEye operatives are advised to pause and take some time to reflect on what may be learned from the past 12 months -- in particular what can be learned from their opponent's 2011 nominating petitions. The upcoming municipal election is just around the corner. If the opposition hasn't been thrown off the ballot yet, then what are you waiting for?!

This year's collection of calligraphic cavils are fulsome enough to fill out a LakeCountyEye blog post:
  1. Greg Jacobs filed petitions with 130 signatures, to be on the ballot for Mundelein trustee. But one calculting objector pointed out that 130 is a few shy of the 148 minimum required. Jacobs may be down for the count. According to the Daily Herald ...
    Jacobs blamed "apathy in this town" for the lack of signatures.
    Jacobs to drop out of Mundelein race
    Nothing contagious, your LakeCountyEye hopes.


  2. A petition challenge filed against Schaumburg Library board candidate David Benson identifies 22 signatures of voters not in the district. Benson, counterpunching, told the Daily Herald that he was advised ...
    only to be sure his signatures were from Cook County residents. "I don't know that many people in Schaumburg Township," Benson said. "I did what I was told. I want to do the right thing, and as far as I know I did the right thing."
    Froehlich challenges petitions of three Schaumburg library candidates
    Your LakeCountyEye reminds operatives to never let an attack go by without a quick response.


  3. Deer Park trustee David Kizior is being challenged because his petitions were notarized not with a rubber ink-stamp, but instead with one of those embossing thingy seals. Kizior, hackles no doubt raised, told the Daily Herald:
    "I know the woman who authorized my papers, who said you can't get an imprint-making notary public seal unless you're a notary public," Kizior said.
    Challenger moves to kick senior trustee off Deer Park ballot
    Well, at least not without an eBay account. Your LakeCountyEye wonders how well those embossed petitions hold up after going through the copier?


  4. In West Chicago, Donna May wants to run for alderman as well as for library board. However one nitpicky objector noticed that her petitions show a 2010 election date. From a legal standpoint, the upcoming 2011 Election is scheduled to be held in 2011. Unintimidated, May was on-message when talking to the Daily Herald:
    "Ten years [James] Beifuss has been my alderman, and he's never graced my doorstep. Dude, what's going on? They don't want to talk with you."
    West Chicago woman seeking two elected posts
    Ordinarily operatives are not advised to refer to one's opponent as Dude -- but your LakeCountyEye makes an exception in this case, and will be casting a write-in for May.


  5. An objector to Dan Selep, candidate for East Dundee trustee, claimed that some of Selep's petition signatures were forged -- a time-honored tradition in Illinois. The evidently velvety Selep explained to the Daily Herald that ...
    when asked by more than one woman if she could sign for her husband, he said yes, unaware of the problem.
    East Dundee candidate's petitions challenged
    Dude, way to go!
And after scrutinizing your opponent's petitions, don't forget to send the paperwork through the shredder. They make terrific New Year's Eve confetti!

Sunday, December 26, 2010

Mark Kirk: How about "None of the Above"?

This just in. Senator "I'm so independent, I voted for Don't Ask Don't Tell" is a dead duck. It's time to welcome the new Senator from Illinois, Senator "Yes, Leader McConnell."

We've reproduced Sen. Kirk's Christmas Eve missive here, a "survey" asking which priority his constituents want him to focus on. It's a veritable Dear Santa of right wing wishes. What's your top priority?
  • Spending cuts?
  • Tax relief?
  • Secure borders?
  • Education reform?
  • Repeal of health care?
  • or one of seven more of the usual Republican suspects?

Conspicuously missing, though, is that favorite of independent voter: "none of the above."

And that's a problem because there isn't even a place to suggest that Kirk should be focussing on one thing and one thing only: jobs, jobs, jobs. His list doesn't even mention economic recovery or unemployment. Come to think of it, there is no mention of help for small businesses, either. All you Republican businesspeople who voted for Kirk, I guess you can comfort yourself with that boon for Obama, the line-item veto.

But at least we won't have to worry about Mark Kirk, the independent thinker, anymore. He has his marching orders.

Thursday, December 23, 2010

Smacktalk the Hackmatack

Dashing through the snow
On a one-horse open sleigh,
O'er the fields we go,
Laughing all the way.
When the LakeCountyEye Carollers come singing those words, that means one thing and one thing only. It's time to gas up the snowmobile and blaze some new trails through the Hackmatack National Wildlife Refuge.

Not so fast, however, a 500 square mile Federal wildlife refuge in Northern Lake County is still but a gleam in Santa's eye. As reported on this blog ...
Attack on the Hackmatack
opposition to the refuge is organized and vocal, insisting that a Wildlife Refuge in Northeastern Illinois will amount to another costly and intrusive government boondoggle.

Hackneyed Libertarian slogans like these typically resonate only with the homeschooled ...
Home School
Most everyone else will recognize these concerns as pretense for those special-interests who would prefer to see any Lake County open-space developed into strip malls and bankrupt townhome metroplexes.

Tis the season, however, of peace on earth and goodwill toward all men. If your aim is to sway public interest against a wildlife refuge it may help to extend some convincing -- ie not transparent -- concerns. So in the spirit of bipartisanship, your LakeCountyEye has put together a holiday gift offering of 10 more plausible reasons for opposing Hackmatack:

Ten Believable Reasons for Opposing
the Hackmatack National Wildlife Refuge
  1. The squirrels will become eligible to apply for US citizenship.


  2. Hackmatack is too hard to pronounce; and Bigmacattack National Wildlife Refuge is a protected trademark.


  3. Donttouchmyjunk National Wildlife Refuge is also a protected trademark.


  4. Deer will eat all the medical marijuana.


  5. Thar be gold in them thar hills: Mining companies


  6. Thar be gravel in them thar holes: Stop the Quarry


  7. No Federal Restrictions on Red-Light Cameras.
    Duffy: Go easy on tickets for right turns on red


  8. The AFLAC duck wants 15% of the gross plus 30% of the concession business.


  9. Additional costs for Slow Wildlife Crossing signs will bankrupt the Route 53 extension.


  10. Deal breaker: Often is heard a discouraging word.

And be sure to keep an eye peeled for the LakeCountyEye Carollers, at a front-porch near you!
Deck us all with Boston Chollie,
Walla Walla, Wash., an' a Kalamazoo!
Nora's freezin' on the trolley,
Swaller dollar cauliflower alley-garoo!

Don't we know archaic barrel,
Lullaby Lilla boy, Louisville Lou?
Trolley Molly don't love Harold,
Boola boola Pensacoola hullabaloo
!
Deck us all with Boston Charlie

Wednesday, December 22, 2010

Amtrak thru the Hackmatack

Local gun-toters who were looking forward to a train-ride thru the Hackmatack National Wildlife Refuge and shooting some wild game, Buffalo Bill style, are going to have to wait. A new Amtrak train line will not be stopping, as hoped, in McHenry County. The proposed Chicago-Rockford-Dubuque line will stop in the more temperate municipality of Elgin, instead.

The Northwest Herald not surprisingly is not pleased:
Before the election, Gov. Pat Quinn told us a new Amtrak route connecting Dubuque, Iowa, and Chicago would run through McHenry County, Belvidere, and Rockford on its way westward. The state had the money, Quinn said, and would pay the $62.3 million it would cost to run the line through Huntley and Marengo. Last week, the Illinois Department of Transportation, no doubt with Quinn's tacit approval, reversed course. Now the line will skirt McHenry County and Belvidere altogether, instead running through South Elgin and Genoa before curving north toward Rockford. Chalk up another loss for McHenry County, a place rarely visited by most of our statewide politicians.
State snubs county again
Sharp-eyed operatives will observe that the same Northwest Herald, only a week earlier, was not-pleased over plans to create a Hackmatack National Wildlife Refuge. The details were reported on this blog by senior cyber-analyst, Mr Redtail ...
Attack on the Hackmatack
The Northwest Herald is quite happy to see money spent to build an Amtrak line in McHenry County. But dollars (and considerably less than 62.3 million of them) for a Wildlife Refuge is a government expense we can't afford. In other words: why isn't big government -- which has no business managing any property in McHenry County -- appropriating property in McHenry County for a railway corridor?

When out on the lawn there arose such a clatter? Nope -- that would be the sound of your LakeCountyEye's head exploding.

Note to operatives at the Northwest Herald: those statewide politicians may all be snubbing McHenry County because they are tired of having to listen to the LOL Libertarianism.

Tuesday, December 21, 2010

Seasons Greetings

To all of our readers... 
Please know
as we wind down on 2010
let your celebrations be filled with an abundance of all things
wonderful and pleasing!
Our Best Wishes and Cheers to a Happy & Healthy
2011

Monday, December 20, 2010

Attack on the Hackmatack

The US Fish and Wildlife Service is currently studying the feasibility of a huge National Wildlife Refuge in Lake County and neighboring areas. To be called Hackmatack, the refuge will extend from Ingleside to Crystal Lake & Harvard in McHenry County, and north into Wisconsin.

Why should we care? Open, public land is a precious natural resource was can bequeath to our children, but only if it is preserved before being developed. National Wildlife Refuge System was created 100 years ago by Teddy Roosevelt, to set aside public land to protect wild animals and plants. Anyone who enjoys hiking, birdwatching, hunting, fishing on public lands today can thank Roosevelt for his vision.

So why does the Northwest Herald oppose the Hackmatack National Wildlife Refuge?

At first glance the Northwest Herald would be commended for covering the efforts to establish the Hackmatack Refuge. However a close read of the most recent Herald story would suggest that they are covering the Hackmatack to kill it. That story was little more than a soapbox for spokespersons from the Heartland Institute and the Cato Institute, both well-funded libertarian think tanks that want to see all publicly held land in private hands.
Push for Hackmatack refuge prompts debate on land use
A Northwest Herald editorial last week spelled out their reasons for opposing the Hackmatack National Wildlife Refuge:

we don't need to be adding to the responsibilities of a federal agency that is not working on vital issues right now. We've got a massive federal deficit. Joblessness still near 10 percent. A war in Afghanistan. A significant deployment of troops in Iraq. Nuclear proliferation concerns in North Korea and Iran. New terrorism concerns cropping up regularly. Do we really need taxpayer-funded federal employees spending countless hours and resources studying whether we need a reserve to protect the northern harrier? And then the federal government buying up more land – it already owns about a third of all land in the U.S. – that it then has to spend even more money on to maintain? Our short answer is no.
Wrong time for fed study
Excuse me, but I do not recall the Northwest Herald ever saying their short answer to the Iraq War was no. A war which added a trillion dollars, and counting, to that massive federal deficit. But when it is a matter of a few dollars to fund a Fish & Wildlife Service study, the Herald thinks it is time to pull the plug. The Northwest Herald can say they are "not opposed to the idea of preserving open space and the life of plants and animals."

Northwest Herald, this observer finds that hard to believe.

Wednesday, December 15, 2010

Gidget Goes to Washington

Freshly minted US Senator & minty fresh divorcee Mark Kirk may be signalling his eligibility:
For the record, your LakeCountyEye was under the impression that a maiden speech is something they would allow in a Parliament somewhere ... of some French country ... like Canada ... or Massachusetts.

Saturday, December 11, 2010

Is there only One who is getting it right in Lake County?

This is a Press Release issued by Sam Yingling, Avon Township Supervisor on December 10th.

Other Say Tax Hikes, Avon Township Says Cut Fat

The Avon Township Board will be considering a reduction in the Township’s tax levy at this Monday night’s (December 13,2010) monthly board meeting. Being considered will be an overall Township tax levy reduction of approximately 7.2%.

“When seeking office, we made a commitment to the taxpayers to reduce the levy by 8.7% over the course of the 4 year term of office. In just these past two levy cycles we will achieve a total tax reduction of 7.9% and I am confident we will well exceed the 8.7% reduction we promised the taxpayers”, stated Supervisor Sam Yingling, “The culture of unnecessary taxation and bloated bureaucracy must come to an immediate end.”

The largest levy reduction will be from the Township’s Road and Bridge levy in the amount of 41%. Additional levy reductions being considered will be in the Town of Avon levy in the amount of 3.7% and the Permanent Hard Road levy in the amount of 1.7%. This is the most aggressive local attempt to cut costs, streamline budgets, and provide taxpayers with the greatest tax relief during these challenging economic times.

“The State keeps talking about tax increases and service reductions," Supervisor Yingling said, "But it's time to discuss how to make government more efficient, eliminate waste and duplication. We must recognize that Illinois has one of the highest numbers of taxing entities in the country. We must consolidate these taxing entities and reduce costs. We must look at overall Township reform."

Wednesday, December 8, 2010

Q Joe Walsh

The McHenryCountyBlog, a WikiLeaks mirror website, has released from their underground nuclear bunker, a new trove of secret documents. The latest revelation comes from the spam folder of an unnamed source inside the Joe Walsh campaign. An email purportedly from the Eighth District Democrats & Independents urges recipients to show their support for congressman-elect Walsh:
Our accidental Congressman, Joe Walsh, will be holding a series of "listening tour" town halls this month. I suggest we all go and give him an earful.
Democrats Urge Democrats to Attend "Accidental" Congressman Joe Walsh's Town Hall Meetings
There is nothing quite as snooze-worthy as one of these sparsely attended congressional townhalls. On a good evening expect to see someone whose Social Security checks are being sent to Yugoslavia and maybe someone else who needs their green card stamped. So your LakeCountyEye is not surprised that they are trying to gin up some last-minute turnout for the Eighth's newest congressman-elect:
Some questions you might want to ask (or any burning question you have):
  1. How will you bring jobs and businesses to the Eighth District?
  2. What is your plan for getting banks to lend to small businesses in the Eighth District?
  3. What do you think your win over Melissa Bean has given you a mandate to do in Congress?
  4. What do you mean by the revolution you talked about during the campaign and how do you plan to accomplish it in Washington?
  5. How will you vote when Congress is asked to raise the debt ceiling after you take office? (If they don't vote to do it, the government will shut down, as it did in 1994.)
  6. Will you vote to repeal Obamacare and why? (Yes, call it that to get an honest answer.)
  7. Do you think we should add $700 billion to the deficit over the next ten years just to give tax cuts to people making more than $250,000 per year? Since you are a deficit hawk, will you vote against such tax cuts even if Republican leadership asks you to vote for them?
Democrats Urge Democrats to Attend "Accidental" Congressman Joe Walsh's Town Hall Meetings
Q&A is one way to inject some zest into a meeting of this sort. But your LakeCountyEye does recall one congressman who, when asked how much a gallon of milk cost in the district, was forced to yield to a staffer. That congressman, needless to say, is now in retirement.

Operatives may be curious to attend one of these townhalls. However unless you are a glutton for punishment and enjoy hearing a congressman pontificate by the hour, your LakeCountyEye suggests attending forewarned and forearmed with some of your own questions to ask.

Ten Recommended Questions to Ask Congressman-Elect Joe Walsh

  1. Boxers or briefs?


  2. Who is buried in Roland Burris's tomb?


  3. What is the price of a Rolex in the Eighth Congressional District?


  4. Why are manhole covers round?


  5. As a licensed process server, the State of Illinois requires me to ask if you currently reside at 329 Locust Road in Winnetka?


  6. Can you play Life in the Fast Lane for my retirement party?


  7. I got here late, can we all say the Pledge of Allegiance again?


  8. Does ?


  9. Who let the dogs out?


  10. Erm, just what exactly do you do for a living?

Operatives are reminded that they must phrase their questions in the form of a question.

Wednesday, December 1, 2010

Dr Smith Goes to Washington

Mark Kirk was finally sworn in to occupy Illinois's golden Senate seat. And, judging from the numbers on the Mark Kirk Internet countdown clocks, not a minute too soon. The minuses on these popular web countdown timers were growing so large, your LakeCountyEye was fearful of an immanent Internet meltdown -- one to rival the Y2K Internet meltdown of Y2K.

Thankful LakeCountyEye operatives able to survive saw Mark Kirk become our newest junior US Senator. The Sun-Times provides the details ...
For all his years in Congress, Kirk has mainly stayed on the House side of the Capitol. Almost giddy with excitement, Kirk talked to reporters about actually being on the Senate floor. "It's kind of a 'Mr. Smith Goes to Washington' feeling," Kirk said.
Kirk sworn in as state's new senator
For operatives who weren't operating back in the day, Mr. Smith Goes to Washington is a 1939 Jimmy Stewart movie about an idealistic outsider sent by the voters to Washington, who took on the entrenched interests there and stood his ground. Long story short, Mark Kirk is naturally feeling like a 21st Century Mr. Smith.

Some left-of-center operatives will however be thinking, now just hold on one goll darn minute here sir! Kirk, a calculating insider who never held a job outside of Washington, has stood for the entrenched interests there since Y2K. It strains credulity to fancy Mark Kirk as a Mr. Smith.

In his defense, your LakeCountyEye is remindful that at the moment in question Kirk was giddy with excitement.

So in the spirit of ecumenical bipartisanship, some of your LakeCountyEye's favorite movies have been tabulated; and operatives are invited to vote for the film that they think best captures Mark Kirk's ascension to the US Senate floor.

If it were made into a movie,
Mark Kirk's election to the Senate would be ...
Herbie Goes to Monte Carlo
Bonzo Goes to College
Gidget Goes Hawaiian
Mark of the Vampire
Dr No
Peewee's Big Adventure
O Lucky Man!
The Incredible Mr Limpet
Ensign Pulver
Rear Admiral
This Internet poll is conducted by Price Waterhouse, winners to be announced Mar 25, 2010 during the 83rd Academy Awards ceremony. Stuffing the ballot box is not to be tolerated.