Monday, May 3, 2010

Regrets Only

Sarah Palin is on your LakeCountyEye radar this week. The politician with more EXes in front of her name than a porn star will headline a Republican funder May 12 in Rosemont. Palin is a favorite among the Tea Partiers, which makes her a proven draw and fundraiser. However those to expect to not show up, and in droves, are any 2010 Republican candidate within earshot of the event. The Daily Herald explains why ...
... for all of Palin's star power as a former vice presidential candidate whose autobiography recently dominated the best-seller charts, many Republicans running for office in Illinois are not jumping up to meet her. "They don't want to take the risk, but I'm sure they will take the money," surmises Paul Green, a veteran political professor with Roosevelt University. A photo with Palin could prove damaging to some Republicans running in suburban districts that have been trending more and more Democratic in recent elections, Green says.
Republicans hopefuls will keep their distance when Palin comes to town
LakeCountyEye Operatives inside camp Palin have obtained their fundraiser's invitation list, along with some of the sent regrets. Ten have been mustered below. Someone is not amused!

10 Candidates Who Send Sarah Palin Their Regrets
CandidateOfficeRSVP Excuse
1Dan DuffyState SenateStuck at a Red Light
2Mark KirkUS SenateSubmarine Duty
3Matt MurphyState SenateWaiting for a Legislative Fleet Vehicle
4Peter RoskamUS CongressRépondez s'il vous plaît?
This is America. We speak English.
5Bill BradyGovernorAppointment with IRS Auditor
6Joe WalshUS CongressCampaign Bus Wheels Repossessed
7Bob DoldUS CongressHeld up at the Pharmacy.
Bob Dold knows a little about Viagra.
8JoAnn OsmondState RepresentativePlease RSVP to Linda Pedersen
9Mark CurranLake County SheriffScheduled Conference Call w/God
10Rod BlagojevichAnother Ex-GovernorInsufficient Capacity at the Rosemont for More than One Drama Queen

With this many no-shows, there are no doubt plenty of good seats available -- exclusively at TicketMaster. As for your LakeCountyEye ...
I just got an invitation through the mails:
"Your presence requested this evening,
It's formal, a top hat, a white tie and tails."
Nothing now could take the wind out of my sails.
Because I'm invited to step out this evening
With top hat and white tie and tails.
I'm putting on my top hat,
Tying up my white tie,
Brushing off my tails.
I'm duding up my shirtfront,
Putting in the shirt studs,
Polishing my nails.
I'm stepping out, my dear,
To breathe an atmosphere
That simply reeks with class;
And I trust
That you'll excuse my dust
When I step on the gas.
For I'll be there,
Putting down my top hat,
Mussing up my white tie,
Dancing in my tails.

Top Hat, White Tie and Tails
See you in Rosemont!

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Awesome....this made me chuckle for a few hours.